Do you think keeping the desire alive in a couple is difficult? That might be part of the reason why it is. If you are thinking of sex as something that you need to entertain instead of something you (both) enjoy, maybe you need to remember why you are in a couple. There are ways for you to get back to wanting to be closer to the one you love more often. Here are a few of them.
Come Home with a Sextoy instead of Flowers
Now, don’t use this as an excuse not to bring flowers home. But once in a while, why don’t you switch to sex toys you can find on Loveandvibes.co.uk. Never bought one? There is always a first time for everything. Were you feeling strange going into a sex shop? Shop online. The truth is, sex toys have never been as popular as now. The COVID-19 crisis has democratized its usage for a large portion of the population. And if you wonder what your girlfriend will think if you order a sex toy, don’t. Everyone loves pleasure, and unlike the flowers, this gift will remain with the two of you for a long time.
Come out and Talk about your Fantasies
Communication is an important part of a relationship. Sometimes, we are worried about unveiling parts of us that we feel too intimate to share. But most of the time, what happens is that your partner will be happy to find new ways to please you. The love shared in a couple is about understanding each other’s desires. So instead of both guessing, sit down and talk about your fantasies. Chances are this conversation will turn into action.
Ladies: Dress to Play
If you feel like your partner doesn’t see you anymore, why don’t you try dressing differently? Of course, lingerie will always get his attention but start by unbuttoning a couple of buttons from your shirt, showing a bit more cleavage. Put on a short skirt and sit in a way that he’ll have to look twice. Desire in a man is often visual, so dressing up can light the flame again.
Men: Be Romantic and Attentive
Women like attention. They also want to be impressed by their man. Open the door of the car for her and help her climb in. Write the little notes that you leave all over the house or a love letter to let her know that you still think of her and appreciate everything she is. Prepare a romantic candlelit dinner without letting her know before. Love and attentiveness work better than anything else to bring back desire in a woman.
Break the “Two-Year Curse”
Most couples end up losing the intense sexual interest in the “honeymoon phase” within the first two years of a relationship. Some specialists say that it can sometimes take as little as six months for things to start fading away. Although some will tell you that it’s normal, be an adult, and make up your own mind. Do you really want to lose that special part of your relationship? And if so, ask yourself: Why should you?
Yes, time passes by, and the novelty goes away. It is so with a new car, a new house, and a new job. But that doesn’t mean it should be so, especially when it comes to our private life. If you decide to get married and two years later the fire between the two of you doesn’t exist anymore, what will you do? Do you really feel comfortable with a sex life that will be boring or that will be intermittent throughout the rest of your life? Are you thinking you’ll simply go looking somewhere else to fill that part of your life? If not, then maybe you should read the next paragraphs.
Desire: Something to Keep Alive in Our Mind
Looking at the neighbor’s grass and thinking that it looks greener is common. Or should we say: “It’s a common mistake.” That’s because your neighbor most probably thinks that yours is greener. We desire the things we don’t have. Too often, we even get bored with the ones we have. That is what makes capitalism work. But let’s face it: Love shouldn’t be part of an economic system, right?
If you agree, then there is a very simple solution to keep the relationship alive. And boys (and men): This one is in your hands. Time to “man-up” as we say and make this beautiful and intensely sexual relationship last forever. I am sure you are quite curious to know how by now.
No, it is not about money. No, it is not about keeping that body of yours in great shape (although you should; for her – or him – mostly for yourself). It is about reminding yourself, daily, how beautiful the woman/man in your life is. How lucky you are to have that person in your life. How delightful it is to join your bodies together. If you do so, every time you look at your “better-half,” then you will have something all men dream of A perfect sexual relationship that will last forever.
Ask Yourself: Is this a lack of Desire, or Is the Problem Somewhere Else?
You should try to keep the fire alive, but not at all costs. Although we forget the union’s beauty between two people easily, we should not mistake the lack of desire for something usual when it represents a deeper, more preoccupying problem. Sometimes, we run away from making love for other reasons than lack of desire. There might be something in the couple which disturbs us so profoundly that it keeps us away from our partner. In such cases, it might be best to seek other alternatives than to get closer again.
We all know (or have heard) about make-up sex and even revenge-sex. Although the first one can be good if the idea is to get back together because we are still in love, it is not the way to go if we feel uncertain about our relationship. It is better to stay away from having sex if we are unsure of our feelings. Or else, you might feel quite awkward when you wake-up the day after…