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back at work after 4 great days off 😁 but finally saw my ❤️ again 😙 break now with those yummy things 😋🤤
User Image p.usteblume Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:53 PM (UTC)

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Ganz easy das Abendessen gepackt 💪
Erst war's komisch, nach 2 Wochen mal wieder alleine zu essen und nicht von mindestens 3 Schwestern und 2 Diätassistentinnen beobachtet zu werden und ständig korrigiert zu werden. Aber dann hab ich's auch ein bisschen genossen. ☺

Mal wieder Brot mit Messer und Gabel zu essen (was hier als verboten - da essgestört - gilt) 😂
Und auch in Ruhe Essen zu können, das hab ich vermisst 😊

Ansonsten hatte ich auch einfach, vermutlich durch das Fieber, mega Hunger. Und da ich eh zunehmen muss, war auch das schlechte Gewissen aushaltbar 💪 #Essstörung #Magersucht #anorexie #Anorexia #es #ed #eatingdisorder #edfam #beating #edfighter #anawhore #survivor #hospital #krankenhaus #klinik #Seeparkklinik
(Possible TW)
♡ This next instalment in my #iamnotashamed photo series is probably the toughest one yet. Also just to clarify, I said 'traits' for a reason, I have never been officially diagnosed with actual PTSD but rather 'traits' off it alongside other disorders. ♡ I've never really talked about this before on here and that's partly because it's difficult but also partly because I didn't feel my struggles were valid or that I was 'ill enough' compared to people that have PTSD from things like war or sexual assault.
♡ But I realised this week that I would never, ever tell anyone else that they're struggles weren't valid or that they weren't ill enough - in fact I actually strive to do the very opposite. ♡ And so this is me. I have traits of PTSD from traumatic experiences that happened while I was hospitalised. It affects me in various ways, I get flashbacks and nightmares, I'm very sensitive to people touching me especially when I'm already upset (it breaks my heart that I have tell people - especially my Mum- 'no' to a hug sometimes because I know it would trigger flashbacks). I sometimes have panic attacks that can last for hours at a time and I try to avoid lots places, people and things that would trigger me. Even certain words or smells can cause flashbacks and trigger things.
♡ I have symptoms of PTSD.
♡ I am not ashamed. ♡ And you shouldn't be either.
♡ Your struggles are valid even if you didn't go to war.
♡ You're fighting a war every single day in your head and so in my eyes you're all soldiers.
♡ You are far braver than you will ever know.
So very much love,
Anna x
Hello #flipfriends! I’m going to start tagging you guys again because adding more people to the group makes me so happy haha. Like YES! We deserve fun yogurt that tastes good! Diet yogurt does not compare. This is the real deal, and it should be enjoyed 😌
User Image sweetiepotatoash1 Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:44 PM (UTC)

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So I thought about this when I put on this shirt this morning and noticed that it was a bit tighter than the last time I wore it (which is fiiiine). Remember when this tshirt used to hang off of me? I do. Skin and bones isn’t the way to live and keep your body healthy.
Also my thoughts on thigh gaps (since being in recovery): why are we so concerned about the absence of space? “I want my legs to be smaller” “I want my arms to be smaller”. Why? It seems ridiculous to me now. The purpose of your legs is for walking, to be able to carry your body. You can’t do that very well on sticks. Why do we want less of a body?
Anorexia is a mental disease. It takes over your mind and everything you think. Once you realize that it’s lying to you, then you can break free and have a happy life. #vegan #ana #anorexiarecovery #edrecovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #food #collegelife #edwarrior #recovery #fooddiary #prorecovery #edfam #anafighter #mentalhealth #freegan #plantbased #me #fitspo #recoverybody #bodyimage
User Image roxie_vs_ed Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:37 PM (UTC)

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Dinner that I made for me and my aunty.
Teriyaki Salmon (!!) With stirfried veg, mixed grains including Brown rice (!!) I used coconut oil to cook with 👊
And the salmon I started to fear oily fish but they are good for arthritis and energy and just in general good for the bod and brain.. So I'll do what I want.
My aunty liked her dinner and she said she was really happy to come home to me being here and I didn't say anything back because I'm like why. I'm worthless and in the way all the time 😭😭 it made me feel like I matter and it scares and confused me 😣😣 Sooo. I haven't been to the new house yet. I have been uncontrollably cold all day plus this fatigue. Rheumatoid is such a killer. I slept most of the afternoon away and I feel so guilty because I haven't moved around alot. Like oh I shouldn't eat this. But then... my rheumatoid is only going to get worse the longer I prolong this.
But with the house move.. my mum just called and said the old house owners were basically just taking piss and were still moving their stuff out after 2 hours of them being told they had to be out.m when they have been rushing everyone else's solicitors to get everything done the past few months. 😬 so it's all stress. But me and my aunty are going to walk down to and help out with a few bits :) Plus I was hungry because looking back at my lunch it wasn't enough. Lunches seem to be a struggle for me. I can remember for like 2 years if my life a while back people would be like do you eat lunch and my response was "I don't believe in eating lunch" 🤔🤔🙃 STFU EDwyn. So I'm proud I've stuck with having lunches for so long consecutively 😂
#salmon #teriyaki #seafood #healthyishappy #strongnotskinny #nourishnotpunish #balance #balancednotclean #balancedeating #stress #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #edfam #edrecovery #edwarrior #beatana #fuckanorexia #food #feedfeed #wholefoods #family
User Image paigewolfreys26 Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:37 PM (UTC)

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Pretty much winning at life 🙋🏼‍♀️ easiest yummiest salad ever !! Eating healthy doesn’t have to be hard! ☺️
User Image helterjungler Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:32 PM (UTC)

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Don’t want to keep back.
For the last two days I had two failures.
I’d bought these sweets today evening supposing to space it out for a half of the week or more. And ate it in several minutes.. I had been worried that I could fail and I had needed to stop and think before eating, but I didn’t even resisted my impulse much.. And it’s the awfullest factor for me. And the same was yesterday.. I don’t even know with what it’s connected because I felt myself such happy and confident as never before and I couldn’t awaited that it’ll crush this way.
What if it’s my inside unconscious resistance to the recovery..? I don’t know what I feel at the moment and don’t know how I should feel myself as I didn’t try to prevent it and I don’t feel compassion to myself, I am rather blaming myself and it’s not without a reason. But how should I be further i don’t know
User Image _icecreamfighter_ Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:30 PM (UTC)

2 Clarendon
Yaaay it is finally #weekend! 😍
I had an 'test' appointment with a new therapist today and it went so much better than the last one. 🤗
For #nightsnack later I am going to celebrate a #pintparty with this #benandjerrys non dairy chunky monkey icecream 😍🍌. Wish you all a nice and relaxing evening and weekend ❣️
. . .
Hallo ❤️
#hochdiehändewochenende 😍
Endlich ist die Schul-Woche rum!
Erstmal möchte ich erzählen was gestern Abend passiert ist :
Mein Vater hat gestern als ich beim Training war meine Schultasche durchsucht. Ich finde das geht gar nicht, aber er hat noch eine Packung Paracetamol gefunden und war dementsprechend aufgewühlt. Ich habe sie ihm dann gegeben und er hat angefangen zu weinen, weil er so Angst um mich hat. Das hat mich sowasvon schockiert! Ich habe ihn vor gestern erst EINMAL weinen sehen. Es tat mir so unglaublich leid und es hat mir nochmal enen Tritt gegeben. Selbst wenn ich nicht genug Motivation daraus schöpfen kann für mich selber gesund zu werden, muss ich es doch auch für meine Familie und Freunde tun. Ich will ihnen nicht so viele Schmerzen bereiten.
Ich kann zwar nicht verstehen warum ich ihnen nicht einfach egal bin, aber ich weiß, dass ich ihnen nunmal nicht egal bin und das sie sich Sorgen machen.
Heute war ich wegen des Probetermins nicht in der Schule( die letzten Stunden sind ausgefallen). Der Termin ist so viel besser gelaufen, als der letzte und die Therapeutin war sehr nett. Ich habe sogar eine realistische Chance einen Platz bei ihr zu bekommen, wenn ich von der Schule aus eine Doppelstunde die Woche (Sportunterricht) frei bekommen würde.
Ich hoffe sehr, dass das geht!
Ansonsten habe ich heute nichts gemacht. Später werde ich dann den B&J pint essen, denn ich bin gerade beim Training und habe eine halbe Stunde Pause und dann ist das erste Training im neuen Team! 😳
Ich berichte nachher in der Story 😄
Ich wünsche euch einen schönen Abend und ein schönes Wochenende!
Gebt nicht auf zu kämpfen, ihr seid stärjer als ihr vielleicht glauben könnt ❣️
User Image yummy.recovery Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:26 PM (UTC)

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I finally tried the peanut butter I made at group like a week ago and it was sooo good guys 😋 I’ve been putting it off because I was afraid that i didn’t know the cal counts/macros but I finally tried it and it was really nice 👍 not having the greatest day tbh, but I’m going to try my hardest not to do anything stupid 🙈 stay strong everyone!! 💪💪😘 #prorecovery #edfam #edfood #edarmy #edrecovery #anawho #anawarrior #anarecovery #recoveryisworthit #recoveryispossible #recoveryarmy#recoverywarrior #anorexia #anorexianervosa #anorexiarecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #eattolive #eattogrow #eattogain #edfamily #anafamily #goodbyeed #edcommunity #beated
User Image sporty._.lion Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:26 PM (UTC)

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Goood evening! Heute gabs mal wieder Hirsebrei (Hirse von @koro_de . Mit dem Code: BLANCA könnt ihr 5% bei eurer Bestellung sparen :D *Werbung) Ich hab Hirse so langsam echt in mein Herz geschlossen ,,schnief". -
Euch ist wahrscheinlich aufgefallen, dass ich zur Zeit nicht so viel über mich (also aktuelle Situation) schreibe. Das liegt daran, dass es mir echt scheiße geht, und ich euch nicht jeden Tag mit ,,Mimimimiii" nerven will. Meine Bauchschmerzen werden jeden Tag schlimmer. Bis vor einer Woche war es noch so einigermaßen aushaltbar, aber jetzt ist es teilweise so, dass ich urplötzlich solche Krampfanfälle kriege, und 2 Stunden ohne mich zu bewegen einfach auf dem Boden liege, und warte, bis es aufhört. Ich hatte schon mehrere Nervenzusammenbrüche, vor allem in der Nacht, weil ich nicht einmal mehr schlafen kann. Ich check überhaupt nicht mehr, was ich noch essen kann und was nicht, weil alles gleich schlimme Beschwerden auslöst. Ich bin grad so ziemlich am Ende mit allem. Müde, kaputt, und neidisch auf jeden verdammten Menschen, der keine Bauchschmerzen hat haha. Meine Mutter unterstützt mich jetzt zum Glück und hat auch schon mit dem Arzt gesprochen. Wenigstens muss ich jetzt nur noch 1 Woche warten. Meine Laune ist auf jeden Fall nicht so prickelnd. Ich bin übelst gereizt und fange wegen den kleinsten Dingen an zu weinen. Das sieht man mal, was permanente Schmerzen mit einem machen können. Kein Wunder, dass Reizdarm Betroffene oft Depressiv werden... Trotzdem versuch ich mit dem Lernen so gut es geht am Ball zu bleiben. -
Was geht bei euch so? Die Wärmflasche ist grad meine beste Freundin :D Habt ihr eigentlich auch so hässliche Verbrennungen von der Wärmflasche am Bauch/Schenkel? Hoffe das geht irgendwann weg! ,,glucks"... Habt nen schönen Abend!☆

User Image cai_will_recover Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:25 PM (UTC)

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The kind of snack that perfectly suits Friday evenings - some black tea, this amazing pastry with icing and vanilla stuffing, a mini croissant, a rice cake with raspberry jam and a tangerine 💙

I decided to go to school today because I felt better yesterday and I only had classes until 1 pm anyway. It was pretty nice to be back - I spent three days not leaving home this week and sometimes it's a perfect kind of rest for me and exactly the thing I need, but this time it got pretty boring and sad really fast, so it was good to see my friends again and generally be back to life 😊 And it looks like I have some plans for the weekend for a second week in the row - seriously, I don't recognize myself 😂 I'm afraid that I'll start to honestly enjoy socialising if it doesn't stop 😅 But well, I don't have anything to complain 😊 And I hope you all had an amazing day and will have even better weekend 💙

#ed #eatingdisorder #edrecovery #prorecovery #realrecovery #realcovery #bulimiarecovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #recovery #edcommunity #edfam #edfamily #recoverycommunity #edwarrior #edfighter #edsoldier #beatana #beatmia #fuckana #fuckmia #nourishnotpunish #nourishtoflourish #anawho #fearfoodfebruary
User Image purehealingfromwithin Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:16 PM (UTC)

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a couple of days ago I had the first conversation about my weight/physique with my boyfriend in like.. two years?? and tbh I felt ridiculous because I didn't even know what to say and why I still sometimes imagine myself being super skinny/looking sick. I know that's part of my eating disorder and not really my own intention but my boyfriend was like "why don't you just do your thing and don't care about other's opinions?".. reflecting on that conversation now makes me feel even more ridiculous because I didn't even realise how much I really depend on what others might think of me and how much time I've wasted on these thoughts. like seriously.. why do I care so much?... do I even care? actually I don't. I'm not harming anyone by looking the way I do and taking the space I need, neither do I care if anyone likes the way I look or not. I love seeing and feeling my body change, I love getting strong and healthy, I am proud of myself and I love myself. end of story. have a great weekend everyone! 🌞
#bulimianervosa #bulimia #bulimiarecovery #depression #recovery #prorecovery #ed #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #bingepurge #restricting #essstörung #bulimie #bulimic #recoverywin #edfighter #edfam #edfight #bingefree #purgefree #realrecovering #edfree #edwarrior #bodylove #selflove #bodypositivity #bodyconfidence
User Image bed.warrior Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:13 PM (UTC)

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Summer 2016 to Christmas 2017 #facetofacefriday / #flashbackfriday today... Nearly 100 pounds between these pictures. But the real win is the sincerity in the second smile and the eagerness to take a photo vs dreading the photo. Oh, and having a neck is good too... 😂 .
#weightloss #facetoface #nsv #weightlosstransformation #beforeandduring #recoverywin #beforeandafter #100poundclub #extremeweightloss #fitbit #fitfam #edfam #myfitnesspal #recoverywin #prorecovery #choosehappiness #cico #edwarrior #edrecovery #weightlosssupport #fitspo #inspiration #obesetobeast #fattofit #100poundweightloss #beforeandafterweightloss
User Image recover_fc Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:08 PM (UTC)

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That was my lunch todayy🌻 Salad with feta, crôutons and cucumber🌻
User Image happiness_is_a_warmgun_ Posted: Feb 23, 2018 6:06 PM (UTC)

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Hello! So today I woke up at 11 and went to town to join my mother who was getting a message 😑, I would’ve really like to have one too but I guess that’s only for those who have the money 😅. Then we went to a mall because my mother have to found new work cloths( and she did ! I didn’t buy anything tho 😊. This evening we have friends over for dinner😊. How has your day been ?? #vegan #vegetarian #carbs #carbsarebae #anorexiarecovery #anorexia #anafighter #anawho #fuckana #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #edrecovery #edfamily #edfam #overexecise #overexercisingrecovery #overexercising #exercise #tca #spiseforstyrrelse.

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