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Today = sick in bed and there's nothing that makes you realize what a mess you've managed to make in the recent weeks more than a day spent in your wreck of a room. I try and fight my collector tendencies but they started with stones, morphed into stamps and won't seem to stop - always fueled by some lost in the moment spark of a dream of some future wall-sized art piece (in my forest house, of course) or the tiniest little totem constructed with rocks and twigs that sits on my computer stand reminding me of adventures to come. The best part is collecting and forgetting you collected and finding half a tree's worth of leaves under a huge pile of books, one record set (Mood Music for Dining, specifically), your sister's charcoal drawing circa 1990-something and your guitar case...which is what this👆🏻is. #spaz #collector #leafcollection #autumn #wabisabi #pressedleaves #iknowitsathingnow #akatakingphotoslikethis #butidontcare 🤘🏻🍁📚
Someone suggested that I be explicit the other day and it caught me completely off guard - I mean, what in the hell did it actually mean to be me explicitly in a moment? Why did it scare the sh*t out of me - did I not know how? Was I only 90% there after all these years? This week, amidst being sick and endless shifting details, my mind was rabbit-holing down a path of what 'explicit' actually meant within my life, and I landed here : fear keeps me from being fully explicit. Fear of coming off as weird or heady or too intense in thought, too scatterbrained, too wanting of romance, too impulsive and too eager - too young-seeming even though I am both old and young in the same body and have literally felt the same as a person since I had my first memory and felt aware of 'me' at two years old. Being human is hard to capture. Having a mind that races ahead of you is tough. Life isn't effortless and it's frustrating when being human isn't as pretty as you want it to be. When you're not as good at it as you're pretty sure you could be and all you really need is for someone to see that you're human and be human with you. Put their arms around you. Hold you. Need you. Be ok with it. And then sometimes it feels like it will pass - and it does, sort of - and you find solace in the collision of details : you find a dagger on your bookshelf (that found you in the garden you used to tend) that you always thought was beautiful and a silk dress that is the same color as that one tiny fiber in the sunset that you pine for every day and it rains and the forest is dense and mist is rising from the marsh as the geese fly south in formation and everything around you feels equally like magic and the saddest story ever and your feet are dirty and you're happy in life but still not satisfied and somehow that's ok because you find beauty everywhere and these moments of strength despite riding the edge way too fucking hard. And : you finally feel that maybe you're *this* much closer to owning what you is explicitly and you f*cking take photos as evidence. It might not mean anything to anyone else, but I now know the difference between courage and bravery, and it's fear - explicitly.
First shot of moi in my new city. We've been flirting since I was just a little, starry-eyed, music lusting, boy-crazed, how do I get into this show for free teenager. Finally ready for you now...🤘🏻🔥 #chicago #selfportrait #blackandwhitephotography #chi #shootthiscity #mirror #dearchicago #windycity
State & Madison. The compass of the city = 0°. Folks have gathered here forever and the vibe is palpable. These guys totally charmed me - and everyone on the street - with some serious talent and radiant goodness. I think they go by something 'Wild' but unfortunately I can't remember. Thanks for welcoming moi to your city. Hope to stumble upon y'all again... *update : aka the Wrong Trio. (You're welcome.) #chicago #chicagomusic #thewrongtrio #streetmusicians #windycity #shootthiscity #blackandwhitephotography #takeyouwild #chi
You could say I'm intrigued...✨Spent the afternoon walking around Chicago and am crushin' pretty hard on its grit and soul. I took a bunch of photos, reveled in the blue-grey gloom, wore my red leather jacket (and felt like a beacon. ha.), made friends with a street band, felt the chill of impending winter, played tourist, ate deep dish pizza and lit the kindling for my new life here. Stoked to find a place to call my own in this gem of a city....I feel like we might be fast friends.💎#dearchicago #chicago #secretplaces #wandering #shootthiscity #colorpalette #dspattern
A week ago. 1,653.2 miles away, lost in a moment. The Fogo Island ferry split the sky like a seam ripper and carried the clouds along with it... #fogoisland #ferry #newfoundland #canada #greyblue #beauty
'You'll never be alone if you have music.' - said a total stranger that I'd met 0.2 seconds earlier at the tiny brewery housed in a storage unit in my hometown. How did he know that I'd spent the entire day in a meeting room - more than aware that I'd spent the entire day *without* music? What about me led him to understand that I've made / still make music? That I've so intensely felt the pen to paper, voice to word muse in my ear lately - that I needed those words. Last night, during a hard drive hunt for photographs of a long since gone trip, I uncovered a folder that held all my college essays and poems. There was a piece I wrote on élan vital, and it tugged at the back of my thoughts all afternoon. Magnetism and life energy - life speed - they have always been captivating subjects for moi... The relation of pieces to other pieces. The relation of one's position to another through moments in time - weaving in and out, together and apart within a loom. After two beers, and four hours of broken sleep - feeling like a tiny, fighting (singing) thread. #music #elanvital #magnetic #takeyouwild #🔥
A million years ago already. [Time is swift.] It rained all afternoon, and golden leaves rained down too. The randomness of Spotify on random wasn't random and the playlist on my jaunt from city to country grabbed ahold of every ache leftover from the last time I'd felt torn between letting myself go wild and yearning to be tamed; shoving them deep down my throat. A semi truck passed me on our two-lane highway in a slow motion blur of golden-red broadway show bulbed, stoplight in the middle of nowhere under the fucking high-beams haze; a ghost - and I cried, yelled even, to the spirit of all that is being a creative soul in this life, wishing to be taught - to be tamed - to be satisfied. I remembered driving with my high school love to the Walgreens in town to pick up photos from the film counter. It was snowing and his car never really got warm. I think it was a black Chevy something. The lines in the parking lot were white - cracked grey pepper in the asphalt. I snuck into his basement window all the time and never got caught. Looked at his posters and thought I'd never kiss anyone else... #moon #tides #love #want #architecture #words #fogoisland #fogoislandinn #newfoundland #canada #blackandwhitephotography #saundersarchitecture
Sunset at the edge of the world. Or so it felt.✨The magic of this place is palpable. May the stars align for an eventual return...I'm ready for more Canada.
#fogoisland #fogoislandinn #newfoundland #saundersarchitecture #sunset #boutiquehotel #canada #stealingmyheart 🇨🇦🍁🔥
Fogo Island is full of stories and endearing traditions. The language alone is filled with words whose meanings have been reassigned and woven back into the narrative. They call this utterly breathtaking building a 'squish' here - which means anything warped, or distorted in shape. Everything about this place makes my heart fire on all cylinders... 💎 #fogoisland #newfoundland #toddsaunders #saundersarchitecture #architecture #squish #blueskies
Hello, beautiful view.💎Waking up in all my bed headed, favorite new sweater wrapped, never seen a horizon line like this, how the hell did life punt me here glory.✨(A punt is a ship here btw : 'Punts represent a way of knowing born specifically of this place: they were a direct response to human need and utility in times when fishers fished within sight of land.' The islanders found the perfect wind-shaped, swept upward by the elements tree and harvested it especially for the bow of their boats.)
#fogoislandinn #fogoisland #goodmorning #horizonline #oceanview #newfoundland
Spastic energy doesn't quiiiiite cover it lately...the world seems to be moving (careening?) at an impossible pace.⚡️So either that's all of my synapses materializing in front of me and firing off in tandem in a dazzling display of barely three hours of sleep delirium 'fireworks', or simply : the most stunning piece of light & metal I've seen in a hot minute. Either choice feels appropriate.✨💥
#chicago #installation #chicagoart #synapses #brainfried #imovetokeepthingswhole #shootthiscity #warpspeed #lilappelworldtour
I don't know why on earth I never asked for this photo evidence before!🙌🏻🔥💎@luisrules1982 rockin' my first El Camino - a doodle scribbled for an animation I did back in 2011 when I was first learning the motion design ropes. (It truly has a special place in my heart.) Today has been spent following every impulse down the rabbit hole - organizing my thoughts at warp speed prior to a week of moving into my temp digs, starting a gig in CHI, and jetting off to beautiful destinations...also, I maaaaaay have joined the @sony camp re : photography I cannot wait to get my hands on this camera! 🤘🏻✈️📸💃🎉
#2017 #fire #gimme #theyearofchange #lilappelworldtour #elcamino #tattoo #doodle #requestyoursnow #atl #weloveatl #atltattoos
That first cup of coffee you make for yourself after being on the road for a week...✨☕️
Going forward : posting more about feeling and less about trying to present perfect / perfectly timed moments in a curated space. I love this platform, but I'm going to be helllllla busy for a bit, and would rather take that time to share me, which is a little rough around the edges and a bit lo-fi within my downtime. I love blur, fuzzy details, the charm that is the awkwardness of being a human in this world, and though I am admittedly sharp in ways, I think there's certainly enough sharpness to go around - both visually and emotionally. It's been a hell of a year and I'm sure everyone out there is feelin' it, too. #coffee #morningvibes #thankyou #intelligentsia #lilappeltime #8am #sunday
Camera was on and didn't know it. A little wine / happy life / good people buzzed in that golden Georgia light. Just me. Being me. Happy moments driving fast in a sexy car en route to the airport... ✨🔥💎
Not my toast. But so tasty! @8armatl knows how to season and mandoline those radishes to perfect toast toppin' thickness.🤘🏻🔥A whirlwind week in NY with the tail end spent in ATL - and it's so crazy to see how much you've grown in less than a year! I seriously miss you, Georgia. Not a day goes by that I don't think about coming back to you. But until then : it was great to see you and all your beautiful people.❤️ #home #atl #toast #yesplease #missyou #8arm #avocadotoast #weloveatl #saturdayvibes