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wings and thighs, braised in buttermilk with poblano, jalapeño, anaheim, and serrano chiles. onion, garlic, cilantro, golden hominy AND polenta. it tastes like the hug I probably need. hoping to find an actual hug before the sun sets.
I drift between Thinking and Feeling, and have never really understood how anyone can practice one without the other. huddled up with myself, I feel quiet lately and aware and without anxiety for the first time since January. January. It’s almost another January. and today I knew I wanted to bake, but that I also wanted to braise. And if you know me, you just chuckled. because, duh. Does each day also end with a Y? I wanted chinese flavors, but craved a middle eastern, I made pita bread dough, flavored with five spice and went to the store(s) *** for lamb. and mint. and labneh. and eggplant. *** and the outcome was pretty mental, tbh.
lamb rubbed with doubanjiang, mint, garlic, sesame, cumin. braised with shishito, onion and ginger - in rich turkey broth, shaoxing and tamari/ cinnamon, star anise. Long beans, tiny eggplants, scallions charred separately and tossed in black vinegar and walnut oil. garnished with LABNEH. and the pita, just out of the oven. And it tastes like a miracle,
but also just like dinner on a Wednesday. (It’s Wednesday, right?)
I feel like Henry Rollins is basically going to be in my backyard today, so I needed a punk rock bowl. (kokuho rice with valrhona cocoa powder and almond milk, dates roasted in browned butter, passionfruit, mango, marcona) — think he’ll notice? 🙏🏼
@brandicarlile made me cry during this sunset and with all of these strangers this evening and now I will put on some cozy pajamas before 8pm on a Friday and perhaps have some bourbon.
yesterday while I was on a conference call, the blue angels were doing dramatic dives outside my window, as some dude was jackhammering into the asphalt. as I moved to observe, I noticed two enormous hawks circling right above my apartment, just as three cops on horseback clip-clopped by...and I was like, “am I on some bizarro fucked up irl Hidden Pictures Page in Highlights magazine...aaaaand am I the one who’s lost?” and then I had a spoon of ice cream.
someone asked me my life story today, because they actually wanted to hear it. and I sucked every last morsel from the bone of this tiny pork chop before I even put all this other stuff in the bowl. So, technically? I guess this other stuff was dessert. (celery root purée, mushroom, apple, basil, onion, garlic, serrano, marcona, pecorino)
“this wants sumac,” I said to myself and maybe to the mango. this rice is still warm and sticky, so I squeezed the meyer lemon (still on my cutting board) all over it. And maybe I miss a restaurant. and other things like mangoes.
they say one out of ten shishito peppers will burn your tongue. better than hearts, I’d say. they all break at some point.
don't overthink it. it's supposed to be simple. seems like everyone wants to make simple things weird. why? (these are good and not weird at all)
re-evaluate your perception of everything. wonder more. live in the questions. re-invent, re-examine, re-purpose. and re-fuckinglax. #♻️
warm today. the kind of evening when you wait as long as you possibly can to put on a sweater, so your shoulders get that last chance to be in the open air. And I was wearing a new dress. I live at the beach, but happened to be downtown at 5:00, as people were filing out onto the sidewalks. felt like decades ago when that was something I did too. felt ok. didn't even feel weird. and I don't know why I started thinking about millet cooked in goat's milk, but I did. And I had been marinating bulgogi, so I picked up some scallions and cabbage and mint on my way home. bought a green papaya impulsively. And some blue lake beans. It's all happening. [[[herby green millet porridge, beans and scallions, cooked hot and fast with ginger, sesame seeds, so much garlic and fish sauce - tossed immediately with raw papaya and fresnos. lime) and that meat.]]] today was pretty ok for a Monday.
just when you think it's as good as it's gonna get, it gets better. life should be more like this. I hope it is for you.
I missed plantains with every bite of the chicken, rice and black beans I made last night, a deep and cavernous void that made me crave bananas today. So, I thought waffles. Natch. with bananas and rye and wheat germ and sheep's milk yogurt and flax. Solid. I also woke up wanting alfajores. so, I bought some raw goat's milk. Turns out brown sugar curdles goat's milk (learning is FUN!), so I was left with something that tasted delicious, but looked super gnar. I added black garlic and lemon zest and juice, and strained it (twice). And now it's like some bizarro Latin teriyaki sauce. And I'm into it.
2pm at this point, and not that a clock has ever discouraged me from eating breakfast, I decided to use the waffles as the bread in a leftover garlicky chicken, okra and roasted lemon sandwich (as you do)
And it was really quite good. But, like some movies you love, but would never, ever recommend? Well, yeah. It's kinda like that. Don't make this. And don't watch Willow.
And football is on in the other room. The team formerly known as my home team 🙄 And it makes me feel like someone is here having a proper Sunday, but also like no one is here at all. Nostalgia, you guys. It's like the most amazing sweater you've ever seen and held, but when you throw down the cash and go home and put it on, you somehow don't warm up? You just have a sweater on.
breakfast carbonara with okra, collards, salami and pecorino. because my rules (and time for lots of cardio)
I went to school in the Bronx and every year, as soon as school started, we'd go down to #feastofsangennaro - zeppolis! sausage and peppers! but, it was the proximity to Arthur Ave and the chicken roll at @pugsleypizza that won my heart, ten million times over. And you'd think I would have made myself one in the last 20 years, given I did NOT pursue a career linked to my degree... and yet (I also made one with Molinari hot Sicilian, mostly because the exchange with the butcher makes me giggle) #loveisit
I used to make these a lot more often and I'd never want to eat them. I'd taste them when they looked weird, like some sort of Bill Nye the Science Lady, trying to sort who fucked up what. but, tonight I made them for myself. I started to eat a second one and was like WHOA WHATISHAPPENING (free advice: add other flours to your dough ((seen here: wheat germ, whole dark rye, flax meal (((super recommend))) bread and ap)) because balance is cool in all things, if you can sort THAT)
my kind of micro-dosing, and I absolutely cried when I tasted this pizza. #pms