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User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Nov 17, 2017 4:19 PM (UTC)
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A few weeks ago, I participated in the #outofthedarkness walk in Charlotte. Not even a few weeks after I had my first relapse into incredibly dark places and triggering thoughts. The latter is not a result of the former. // I had been stuffing and burying my feelings so far down. I had been faking happy in certain aspects of my life for so long. Choosing to fall prey to old bad habits and claim victim without looking inwards. // I got comfortable being basic and being average and feeling less than. I got comfortable with being unbothered by these things but talking like I would change something because I could never get complacent. // I had my next relapse not even two weeks after the first. So, I quit my full-time job and decided to rebuild as I looked for another. I’m still looking and rebuilding. // I decided to do more and talk less often about what I’m doing. Yes, you’ll see me on here and Twitter and on the @dreamonyouth accounts. I’m not taking a social media cleanse. I’m simply rebuilding the woman I broke. Every morning I spend it nurturing her now fragile ego so her renewed sense of self will be unshakeable. I do this through prayer, reading, and loving her deeply in her love languages. I let her sit in her fear for a second and then we take action. 2 hours a day every day working towards something bigger. // If you’re wondering, I’m still broken and damaged. But, I’m letting The Lord heal me and make me whole again. // Hey, even boss ladies have it rough sometimes.
Yesterday, my best friend married the love of her life. A man who makes her laugh, loves a good horror movie, and loves her to no end. Yesterday, I fought back tears as she walked down the aisle, as they exchanged vows, as they had their first dance. Stephanie is not only my best friend but we’ve basically been sisters since my mom realized Steph is more like her than I am. 😉 But, I’d honestly like to think God knew the day I had to help open Stephanie’s locker in 6th grade that I’d find a sister in this goofy, book-loving, artistic, brilliant gem. @spaventosa, you made the most beautiful bride. These aren’t all the photos but these were just some beautiful, delicate moments I got yesterday. Congratulations darling, you’ve gone from #soontobelawless to Mrs. Charles Lawless! May your marriage be blessed with love, light, laughter, and joy!
Already planning for many trips to Asheville in 2018 so I can indulge in all the great foods and drinks with good company. Yes, I’m planning on blogging about my favorite places to eat in Asheville soon. I got you. 😉
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 23, 2017 9:07 PM (UTC)
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I had to make a stop in the Blue Ridge Parkway yesterday because the mountains during the Autumn season is one of my favorite things to see. 📷: @katelyn__savannah
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 21, 2017 9:20 PM (UTC)
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A portrait, and coffee break, in the midst of celebrating in Asheville with my three favorite ladies. 📷: @katelyn__savannah
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 17, 2017 2:05 AM (UTC)
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Falling in love with Charleston hour-by-hour.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 15, 2017 4:51 PM (UTC)
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While I'm in Charleston living it up, I had to give a quick shoutout to my mom, my rock, the real queen of my life. A few days before my birthday she surprised me with a gift I wasn't expecting (I'm getting older, gift cards do the trick okay) and one that made me so giddy. If you know me, and know me well, you know I have a slight obsession with Tim Burton. I love his movies. I am devastated when I can't go to events that honor him and his work. Jack Skellington is my true first love. I have no regrets.......So, when she told me she picked these two items for me, I freaked out. Best gifts ever!!!! Mom, thank you for always knowing me best and embracing my weirdness. I love you. 😘 @raishon35
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 12, 2017 1:33 PM (UTC)
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A few weeks ago, I bought a copy of this beautiful book from the local @anthropologie by the beautifully bold @mooreaseal. I promised myself I could not open it, write in it, until my 27th birthday. Well, today I'm officially 2-7! This past year has been the most challenging and most rewarding. I gained more friends, a special someone, more memories, more adventures, more opportunities, more time with God, a better relationship with The Lord, a better relationship with the beauty and power of my blackness; more lessons on how to work smarter with @dreamonyouth and the DOY ladies, and I'm still trying to figure out how it was all packed into a year. Today, I have to work but I am grateful that I have a job so unique, just like me. I am grateful that my coworkers are just cheesy enough to tell me "happy birthday" at midnight while we chat in the hotel room and turn around to laugh when I said "okay, so I definitely forgot again about my birthday." 😳 thank you to anyone who came into the last year of my life and made me better. Cheers to another bad*** year! 🎉✨
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Oct 8, 2017 2:53 PM (UTC)
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Am I the only one obsessed with the @lushcosmetics aesthetic *and* products? 😍 this was taken a few weeks ago but goodness. I had to post it. Sorry not sorry.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 22, 2017 4:42 PM (UTC)
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When the boss tells you to enjoy your weekend and you start thinking about doing it up with your @fentybeauty match stix while vibin' to @beyonce's #Lemonade. ✨
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 18, 2017 11:49 PM (UTC)
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There are days where I question the woman I am, and then there are days like today. Yes, I'm hella extra and stuntin' on people who didn't stand a chance in the first place while simultaneously promoting the positions for my wellness-centered brand. What's good?
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 18, 2017 1:38 AM (UTC)
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I finally have my hands on some @fentybeauty and I already know I'm going to be obsessed. I can be a walking billboard for inclusiveness, my natural beauty, and glowing like the sun? Bless @badgalriri and her team. ✨
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 13, 2017 10:40 PM (UTC)
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I wanted to delve a little deeper for #theimperfectboss campaign and speak a truth that I'm terrified to admit. I tend to act like I'm put together online. I act like there is hardly a moment of self doubt, depression doesn't conquer me as often, and insecurities are a thing of the past.
Y'all, I am straight lying through my teeth if I said I didn't still struggle. These past few months have been HARD. Although I've been creating more and have gotten back to a great workflow, I still have *those* days. You know the ones.

I have nights where I cry myself to sleep. Days where depression crushes every dream I have and I want to quit for an easier life. Days where I'm an emotional wreck with a smile plastered on my face.
I still struggle with self doubt, depression, insecurity, and envy often. I don't envy people for their material possessions anymore but sometimes I feel so defeated to see where my friends and those I follow are in their businesses. Not comparing my story to someone else's highlight reel is easier said than done.
But, I believe letting you know that I am still a very real person, underneath the titles of boss lady and diva, will help you. It'll show you that no, you don't need to have life figured out to do great things. It'll help you realize that businesswomen in every stage still struggle with everyday problems on top of spectacular ones. It'll remind you that you are not alone in this journey and you don't have to be.
I'll still handle my business as a boss lady does but I am no longer afraid of wellness days and reminding everyone I work with why they're working with me. Because, your dreamiest life is very much the real deal, like you, and so is mine. ****Disclaimer: this artwork was purchased at @kirklands.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 12, 2017 9:49 PM (UTC)
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It's baaaccckkk! #theimperfectboss is happening again and this time around I wanted to lead with something all too common for me. Something that I have been dealing with for years whether working for myself or for someone else. I forget to eat when I hustle far too often. Yes, I know I'm not the only one. I have talked about this with awesome game changers, and fellow boss babes, @alexbeadon and Sarah of @hollandlanemag. Like "girl, I've gone without eating a meal too! Sometimes you just get into the hustle too deep. You're not alone." But, the scary truth is why I forget to eat. Because I don't think that I completely forget most of the time. I have unintentionally created this nasty little habit with fear where I feel like once the hustle is on a roll, I can't stop. I can't eat or sleep or go out. I have to go-go-go until the task at hand is finished, no matter how big it is. I'm afraid that if I stop, the task will never get done and inspiration will never visit me again. And ladies, those are normal feelings but they are not truths. Big Magic visits me often in prayer and stillness, or when I'm eating my favorite food, or drinking my cup of tea. Inspiration is always around. And, if I can make time to hustle while working a full-time job, or two, I can make time to eat meals that will energize me to continue on with the muse of inspiration later. Let's stop teaching our teams, our fellow girl bosses, our fellow creatives to relish an over-glorified, overbearing hustle hard-busybody lifestyle. Let's teach each other to hustle smart and practice self care while running the most bad*** biz EVER.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 11, 2017 10:47 PM (UTC)
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Haven't given you a selfie in a bit so here's me living my best life with my good hoops, thick brows, a fall lip, and my fro. 💋
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 5, 2017 3:01 PM (UTC)
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Double posting today because my best friend of many, many, many years (yeah, we're getting old) gets married in a few months. I loved her invitation so much that I had to present it in an extra special way. Stephanie, may you and Charlie's marriage always be rooted in love. May it allow you both to thrive and grow, together, no matter what obstacles come your way. May your marriage and life together be so, so blessed best friend. ❤️
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 5, 2017 2:37 PM (UTC)
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Had to let go of my favorite ankle booties about two weeks ago and I'm still not over it. 😩
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Sep 2, 2017 11:54 PM (UTC)
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👉🏽 LINK *FINALLY* IN BIO 👈🏽 Okay, my fellow boss ladies, @alexbeadon's #5kin5days challenge brought something to light that I've been considering for a long time. Like, possibly eras, at least in my mind. 😂
I'm cooking up a 90 day coaching opportunity unlike anything you've ever seen or been a part of! "Cyd, we've heard that before..." Have you?
Look, you should know by now I am anything but ordinary. I took on six UNPAID interns with not a d*** clue about how to manage a team almost 4 years ago. I just knew I needed help and my biz was getting bigger than I could carry.
@dreamonyouth is still very much a thing and yes, we have the most unique team around. And, we're all still unpaid.
Before that deters you, hear me out. I'm not here to make you money. I'm here to do the one thing you are so scared and overwhelmed to do solo. Build the biz squad of your dreams!
Our 90 days together will be spent 👉🏽 zoning in on the vision for your dream team 👉🏽creating your internship application and leads to bring you right people 👉🏽 finding a management style that best suits you and your team 👉🏽 and SO MUCH MORE! 🎉

As in, I will be giving you some major details and tools that helped my own team, even during our roughest seasons. This is so when you complete your 90 days, you will feel confident in yourself and your team. So much so, you can finally take that vacation to Europe or have a little staycation alone!
Girl, if you want in on any part of this, click that link in my bio! Because, that is the only way you're going to get in on this. I'm just saying.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Aug 27, 2017 3:39 PM (UTC)
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I live for late Saturday nights spent in an oversized sweatshirt and easy Sunday mornings.
User Image itscydneyrai Posted: Aug 26, 2017 2:28 PM (UTC)
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I made it my mission this morning to come out and support the rad people over at @suffolkpunchclt. Let me tell you, there is already a line for coffee and it's not even 11 yet! Come out for music, fun, coffee, food, and good company. ✌🏽 Side note: I'll be doing a review of this hot spot soon. I didn't bring all my cameras for nothing! But really, I'm walking around with like 3 cameras today. 😂