Toggle navigation

More posts from this user

(Eng⬇🇺🇸) Tar en liten pause fra serien i dag og kjører en tilbakeblikk fra den fantastiske turen @bodildall og jeg hadde i forrige uke. Det kan godt hende at skoa var gjennomfrosne det meste av tida, men når man får stjernehimmel, nymåne og nordlys servert til leirbålet så er det ingen som bryr seg om det 😄🔥🏕
/
/
I'm taking a short break in my series on how to be an awesome camping buddy to post a picture from my trip wih @bodildall last week. My shoes were frozen the most of the time, but when you get to watch the northern lights from your spot in front of the bonfire, life just doesn't get better 🏕🔥.
➡New series: How to be an awesome camping buddy. How a well timed nod sometimes would mean the same as throwing my friend in the air.
___
➡🔥🏕Background: Since I work as a clinical psychologist I wanted to share a few tips, tricks and fun facts from my field, hoping that it can be helpful for all the campers following me. Two weeks ago, I wrote a series on how to deal with anxiety. This time I`ll make a series on how to be an awesome camping buddy.
___
➡Last post I wrote about the magic ratio between positive and negative feedback in a working team. As an addition to this post i wanted to talk about what positive feedback might look like in different settings.
____
➡There are huge differences between what a positive statement is depending on where you are and what people you are with. A statement that would be positive in one setting can be negative in a different setting. For example, if I go over to Maria and said "wow, you're so great at building fire" she'd take that as praise. However, if a guy in his sixties told his hiking buddy "wow, Arne, you're so great a building a fire" it might come through an insult.
____
➡At the same time a guy might give his friend a well timed gruff when finishing a job, meaning the highest of praise. If I were to give one of my girlfriends the same appreciation I would have to throw then up in the air and yell.
____
➡We always need to adjust the positive feedback to the setting we're in. For some that might be saying "good job", for others it might just be a friendly nod or a appreciative look. Whatever positive communication looks like among your friends, just make sure you give it six times as often as you say something negative.
🔥🏕 New series: How to be an awesome camping buddy. This post is about what you need to remember when you give negative feedback.
____
➡ Background: Since I work as a clinical psychologist I wanted to share a few tips, tricks and fun facts from my field, hoping that it can be helpful for all the campers following me. Two weeks ago, I wrote a series on how to deal with anxiety. This time I`ll make a series on how to be an awesome camping buddy.
____
➡ Hiking and camping, especially in difficult circumstances, are challenging and it requires all participants to give they`re best. There`s bound to be some disagreements that needs to be solved along the way. This means we`ll have to give each other negative feedback, but how do we do this without damaging the team?
____
➡ Research shows that negative feedback is important and crucial for a team, but to be effective it needs to be outweighed by positive feedback. The magic ratio between positive and negative feedback is six to one. That means we need to give six positive feedbacks per negative feedback.
_____
➡ This is an important number to keep in mind, especially if you`re in a situation where you`ll have to give a lot of negative or corrective feedback. This means you`ll have to look for good stuff to point out, and concentrate on being more positive than negative. It`s a good idea to make a habit of always looking for the positive and express it when it happens, to make sure the team rests on a solid foundation when the difficult days come.
➡🔥🏕New series: How to be an awesome camping buddy. This post is about how Bodil made me feel happy about bringing her coffee every morning.
____
➡Background: Since I work as a clinical psychologist I wanted to share a few tips, tricks and fun facts from my field, hoping that it can be helpful for all the campers following me. Two weeks ago, I wrote a series on how to deal with anxiety. This time I`ll make a series on how to be an awesome camping buddy.
____
➡The first thing I`ll talk about here is the magic of positive reinforcement. This is a difficult word that just means giving your camping buddy a positive reaction when he or she does something good for the team.
____
➡Does your buddy carry on through bad weather without complaining, does she fetch firewood even though you know she`s tired, does he give you that awesome tent spot that you wanted? In that case, give that person a positive reaction showing you see it and appreciate the action.
____
➡There`s only one caveat here. The positive reaction needs to be something that person perceives as positive for him or her, so you`ll need to find out what kind of reaction that person likes before you go ahead.
___
➡An example: A year ago, I was out camping with Bodil and decided to come over to her tent with morning coffee. Bodil got really happy, she talked about this coffee for weeks and even made an Instagram post about it. This made me feel very appreciated when fixing coffee, causing me to repeat that action = more coffee for Bobs ____
➡This might seem too easy, but fact is we are social beings and for most of us it`s very important to be liked by our pack. We need to belong and know that other people see, notice and appreciate our efforts. This makes us feel good about doing them. Most people don`t exploit the potential that lies in giving the people around them the positive feedback they deserve. We think it, but we don`t say it. Give it a try it in your relationships and see how it works for you. Who knows how much coffee in ned you could bed you could be missing out on.
______
➡To read more about this, check out positive reinforcement or read about the relationship research from the Gottman institute.
➡New series: How to be an awesome camping buddy.
___
➡🔥🏕Background: Since I work as a clinical psychologist I wanted to share a few tips, tricks and fun facts from my field, hoping that it can be helpful for all the campers following me. Two weeks ago, I wrote a series on how to deal with anxiety. This time I`ll make a series on how to be an awesome camping buddy.
____
➡Camping and hiking can be demanding physically and emotionally. You`ll get cold, tired and hungry, but you`ll still have to spend two hours pitching tent, fetching firewood, making fire, fetching water before you can relax. When things are physically demanding it`s more difficult to be that cool chill camping buddy we want to be. On the other hand it's really easy to become a negative, biting douche that does nothing good for the team.
___
➡ In addition, we dependent on our camping partners in a completely different way than at home because we`ll have to do all this work together. This can make it a great team experience, but it also demands that we`re good at cooperating and making each other better even when we`re tired, hungry and cold.
___
➡ In this series I`ll focus on a few thing that might make this easier. Some of them will be tips abd tricks, others will be fun facts about how we react in situations when we're worn down. And please keep in mind: these are tips that work in all relationships, feel free to test them on your partner (I shamelessly do that all the time).
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Alma har på mystisk vis klart å snike seg fra yttertelt, til innertelt, til liggeunderlaget mitt (flaks jeg kjøpte large-wide) og nå inn i soveposen. Sånn går det når man er så helsikes søt (og kald)
_____
🇨🇦 Hello! I'm Alma, I get to sleep in mom's expensive sleeping bag since I'm so cute (and cold).
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Batteri under lading i Nordmarka🔋🏕🔥. As we speak så er det pakkings til ny tur med turkone @bodildall fire gode dager i marka, DET skal bli digg det 😀. /
/
Battery charging in progress 🔋🏕🔥. As we speak I'm packing for a new trip with mu turkone @bodildall we're going on a four day trip, can't wait 😀😀.
➡New series: how to overcome fear of camping alone⛺🔥.
_____
➡✔The last week I`ve been writing a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone. I'll wrap up this topic writing a bit about where I was when I started doing this.
___
➡2,5 years ago I knew nothing about camping outside and I got anxious just being inside a tent (YES, inside a tent, in bright daylight, it made no sense). I actually had to pitch my tent in my living room to get used to being there without shaking. The first period I camped out, I had several nights being so anxious I didn't sleep at all before the light came (probably why coffee is on the top of my packing list 🙈🤔).
__
➡Now nothing feels more like home than nature and my tents, I have about 50 outdoor nights a year, 20% of these are alone and I absolutely love it. It's my sanctuary.
___
➡My point is that it`s possible to start from scratch and do this. I hope this can inspire all those who wants to go out and explore to just leave the hesitation behind and do it. Good luck! 🔥⛺
New series: how to overcome fear of camping alone⛺🔥. Norsk versjon: første kommentar.
___
➡Intro: The next few posts I'll make a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone.
___
🔥⛺Background: since I'm a psychologist a lot of people ask me about themes like these. The coming period I'll go through a few of the topics I've been asked about, and share some knowledge and tips.
__
✔Tip number five: Approach it gradually.
___ ➡ If one`s really anxious about something it`s a good idea to approach it gradually. If you get overwhelmed with anxiety just thinking about camping alone, you want to make a step by step plan where you slowly get used to the situation.
___
➡The first trick here it to find out what you`re afraid of; is it the darkness, the part about being alone, is it being in nature or something different? Whatever is making you anxious, make a plan where you can approach it in small doses.
___
➡ Let`s say it`s the darkness that makes you anxious. Think through a situation where you will be exposed to enough darkness to make you anxious, but not overwhelmed with anxiety. An idea would be to stand outside your house, still within the light of your windows for example. When you`re standing out here, just let your self be anxious. If one of the previous techniques works for you, then try to put them at use (write it down if you need to). Now stand there until the anxiety starts to drop.
____
➡When the anxiety is down and you`re ok with standing outside your house, try the next step. Pick a new place that makes you anxious, but not overwhelmed and do the same exercise here. Gradually build up until you start feeling ok with being alone out in the darkness.
___
➡Now this trick works really well for some people, whilst others might find it difficult or unhelpful. Try it if it makes sense for you, if not just leave it.
New series: Tips on overcoming fear of camping alone⛺🔥. ___
➡4⬅
The next few posts I'll make a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone.
___
⛺🔥Background: Since I'm a psychologist a lot of people ask me about themes like these. The coming period I'll go through a few of the topics I've been asked about, and share some knowledge and tips.
___
✔Tip number four: feel your feelings.
___
➡Last post was about making friends with your anxiety. In this post I`ll extend that to make friends with all your feelings.
___
➡So why is this important if you're camping alone? Because avoiding feelings usually makes us anxious. Actually it`s the anxiety that holds the feeling down, since anxiety produces physical reactions that covers up the feeling. In contrast, when you feel the feeling, the anxiety goes away.
___
➡ If this seems weird, just think about a very emotionally painful time in your life. Did you ever experience anxiety symptoms like nausea, dizziness, muscle tension, cold hands or rapid heartbeat? If you did, then that is an example of the physical sensation of anxiety covering up the painful feelings you had.
___
➡On the other side: have you ever felt really tense and anxious, then had a good cry and felt relaxed afterwards? If so, that is an example of anxiety (the muscle tension) leaving your body after you`ve let yourself feel the feeling (crying). So basically feeling your feelings reduces anxiety.
___
➡🔥Here`s the trick: Every time you have a feeling, notice the physical sensation in your body and accept it. Feel angry? Focus on the energy in your body. Feel sad? Let the pain be there and let the tears come. Feel happy? Then let that good energy fill your body. Whatever is going on, just let yourself feel it.
___
➡ Feelings can be painful or uncomfortable, but if you give them some room they usually pass. Feeling your feelings, even the painful ones, is much easier than going around anxious because you're holding them down.
___
➡This might be a difficult exercise for some people whilst others find it easy, use what makes sense for you and leave the rest.
New series: Tips on overcoming fear of camping alone⛺🔥. (🇳🇴 andre kommentar)
_____
➡3⬅
The next few posts I'll make a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone. A lot of people ask me about this topic so since I'm a psychologist and since I also have a lot of wise psychologist friends who helped me out with this when I started, I thought I'd write a bit about it.
___
✔Tip number three: make friends with your anxiety.
___
➡ In my last post I talked about how to keep your thoughts from escalating when you feel anxious. This can keep your anxiety from escalating, but you`ll probably still find yourself feeling anxious.
____
➡ Anxiety is a feeling and a feeling is a physical sensation in the body. The feeling of anxiety usually gives us a fast heart beat, muscle tension, sweating, nausea, diarrhea (I love when that comes when I`m outside), problems concentrating and so on.
_____
➡ You can't really turn off a feeling. When you`re afraid because you're out in the forest, it`s dark and you're alone, it's far along a natural reaction to the situation.
_____
➡ The tip here is to accept that your body is having the feeling of anxiety. It's having a physical reaction to the situation.
_____
➡ Another thing is that anxiety is like your irritating little brother. It will get more intense if you try to ignore it, whilst if you let it be there it will settle down. So when you start feeling anxious, instead of pushing the feeling down, try to notice how that anxiety feels in your body. Do you get tense, does your heartrate go up, are you getting cold hands? Whatever anxiety feels like for you, just let it be there, feel it and try to appreciate it.
____
➡ Remember that anxiety is there to help you. It`s not entirely off to be anxious when you are alone in the forest. When you`re anxious you`ll be more alert and more prone to react efficiently if you`re in a dangerous situation.
___
➡ This tip might help you to settle down a bit when anxious by stop avoiding the feeling. Some people have a good effect of this technique, whilst for others don't find it helpful. If you want to learn more about this, check out mindfulness meditation.
New series: Tips on overcoming fear of camping alone⛺🔥. (🇳🇴⬇first comment)
____
➡2⬅
The next few posts I'll make a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone. A lot of people ask me about this topic so since I'm a psychologist and since I also have a lot of wise psychologist friends who helped me out with this when I started, I thought I'd write a bit about it.
_____
✔Tip number 2: gain control of your thoughts.
_______
➡When we end up sitting out in the forest being absolutely overwhelmed with thoughts of Blair Witch Project it's usually because we had a feeling who triggered thoughts and then the thoughts escalated.
_______
So fear is a feeling and feelings you can't really control or keep down (or you can, but I'll write about that later 🙈). However, the problem with fear is that often makes us _think_ scary thoughts which againg makes us more anxious.
_____
Let me give you one example: i get nervous when it's dark. Then I start imagining all the dangerous things that can be out there. This thought makes me even more anxious causing me to think about the IT trailer I saw the other day (stupid enough). At this point I'll start imagine how IT is hanging out in the forest plotting to kill me, which (as anyone who's seen that trailer understands) makes me want to pack up my tent and go home.
_______
So what we want is to stop this escalation of thoughts, so how do we do that?
1. Accept they thoughts are there, but know that your thoughts are just thoughts, not thruths. This might seem obvious, but trying to hold a thought down usually makes it worse so accept is key.
2. Find alternative thoughts. What could be out there in the forest? A squirrel for example? Write a list.
3. Look at your list of less scary things that might be out in the forest, ask your self what is most likely to be out there: IT or a squirrel?
4. Distract your self, listen to a good podcast, listen to nice music, watch netflix (we're not trying to find peace here, we're trying to survive a night alone without dying from fear)
____
Ok, so this was a few quick tips on stopping the thought grinder. You might still be anxious, but you won't let the thoughts own you.
New series: Tips on overcoming fear of camping alone 🔥⛺. ➡1⬅
The next few posts I'll make a series on how to deal with fear of camping alone. A lot of people ask me about this topic so since I'm a psychologist and since I also have a lot of wise psychologist friends who helped me out with this when I started, I thought I'd write a bit about it. ✔Tip number one:
This tip is on how to mentally prepare your self for doing something you're nervous about.
________
➡Often if we're nervous about something, we think a lot about everything that can go wrong. For example I had a bad habit of imagining how afraid I'd be when I was lying in my tent alone.
________
➡The problem is that our feelings has a hard time distinguishing between reality and fantasy. They usually goes all-in on our imagination making us even more anxious than we were to begin with. It's almost like our mind thinks the bad stuff really happened ➡The good news is that we can use this knowledge to our advantage. If a fantasy can make you really anxious about something it can also make us feel really good about something. Making us more likely to do it.
________
➡So what you do is that you first acknowledge the worst case scenario in you mind. It's just your mind trying to prepare you so don't beat your self up about it. Acknowledge it and then leave it alone. ➡Then make a mental movie about how your first alone-trip would go if it went really well.
___________
➡Think through the whole thing: how good you feel when you get to the campsite, how great you are at pitching your tent, how nice and calm you feel when you're in front of the fire, how you're able to hear strage noises without panicking, how you calm your self down when you're stressed and so on. Make sure you imagine this with colors and feelings, make it as vivid as you can. Repeat this fantasy as often as you can.
______
➡One big tip on this is to imagine this right before you fall asleep. That's usually a time when your mind is calm and impressionable.
__
✔As a end note, I'll say that this is a technique who works really well for some people whilst others has no effect of it. If it doesn't just leave it alone or try something else.
New series: Tips on overcoming fear of camping alone ⛺🔥🔥. The next few post I'll make a series about how to deal with fear of camping out alone. A lot of people ask me about this topic, so since I'm a psychologist and have a lot of wise psychogist friends who helped me out with this when I started, I thought I'd make a few posts with tips on how to deal with this fear.
The reason I want to do this is because I absolutely love to camp alone, it's such a different experience, I feel a lot closer to nature, I feel a lot more at peace with my self and the world and I get such a sence of mastery when I do it.
However, this was _not_ how I felt when I started. I used to be terrified when the darkness came. I've had a few nights when I simply stayed awake until the light came just because I was so afraid, but I kept doing it and kept practicing and after while I stopped being afraid and started enjoying the wonderful experience it is instead.
I hope all the people out there who want to camp alone find inspiration and strength to go out and try it, because it's a such an awesome experience to have.
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Tåke og regn ute, fyr på primusen og varm kaffe inne. Det er livet ass ❤
/
/
Fog and rain outside, fired up primus and warm coffee inside. This is the way a rainy autumn day should be spent ❤.
(Eng🇨🇦⬇) Det var sånn ca på dette tidspunktet at roen kom. Da teltet var satt opp, bålet knitret fint og himmelen ble blå. Det er dette jeg søker etter når jeg er ute og alene, denne roen jeg kun finner i naturen. #lifegoal /
/
This was the moment when the peace came to me. The tent was up, the bonfire was lit and the sky had turned blue. This is what I'm looking for, this is what I'm searching.
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Merker at jeg etterhvert har blitt imun mot "vær" driter litt i om det er regnvær eller sol når jeg er ute. Det er litt som følelser, hvis man ikke prøver å føle seg happy hele tiden så har egentlig alle følelser sin sjarme og sitt sted. /
/
I've started liking all kinds of weather the last few years. It's like feelings, if I stop trying to feel a specific way and just let whatever feeling is there be, all emotions have their own goodness.
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Når du trudde det skulle regne hele turen er det ganske chill nær du innser at yr har tatt grundig feil og at du får en finfin bålkveld helt for deg selv siden resten av Oslo trodde det skulle regne ⛆😀💃. /
/
When you thought it would rain the entire trip it's pretty sweet to discover that the weathee forcast was wrong and that you'll have a great bonfire night alone in the forest 😄💫💃.
User Image psykolog.med.sovepose Posted: Oct 19, 2017 6:15 PM (UTC)
614
29 Juno
(Eng⬇🇨🇦) Igjen fikk vi sykt mye cred for friskussøndag, men fakta er at vi kjørte opp på Grefsenkollen, satte opp tarpen, tente bål med en juksekubbe og lå på reinsskinnet og duppa i et par timer. Neste gang får vi Foodora til å levere maten, bare sånn for å understreke at dette er noe alle får til 🙈👊👧👦
/
/
Again we got a lot of cred for our very "active" Sunday trip, but thruth is we drove 15mins, pitched the tarp, made a fire with one of those logs you buy at the store and lay sleeping on our raindeer skin for a few hours. Next time we'll order food from Foodora just to underscore that everyone can do this 🤠👦👧🦊🏕🙈