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jhutchlovesme10 Listen to ‘Little Things’ by One
Direction for this chapter
Chapter 11
I haven't been back to see my “doctor” for two weeks.
And now, it's been three months
since Noel died.
I haven't made much progress and I
know that.
I hope she's still proud of me, even
though all I do is disappoint.
I never thought I was a good actor or
anything, until she came around.
She made me feel better about
myself and I couldn't do the same
for her.
Sometimes I wake up because I
have dreams of the day before her
death and I wish I could take
everything back.
I hope she forgives me for what I did.
As I lay here, next to her grave,
surrounded by the many others, I
ignore my surroundings and only
think of her.
I think of her bright smile, the way
she laughed, the way her eyebrows
furrowed when she was confused.
It was all perfect to me, all of her
little things.
For the past three months, I've been
ruminating on how she couldn't see
how beautiful she was.
It broke my heart to know that she
didn't see the things I did.
I always told her how much I loved
her, how gorgeous she was, and how
I loved the small things that she did,
that she didn't think twice about.
But to me, they perfected her.
None of it mattered anymore because
she's gone.
“I didn't tell you enough, did I?” I
asked the air.
“I wish I did. I wish I told you every
second of every hour of the day, so I
wouldn't have to deal with the loss of
you. I would take back all of my
mistakes if I could, I'd appreciate
you, and I'd kiss you like you've
never been kissed before. I wouldn't
doubt you, or deny you, ever. You
never deserved that shit from me. I
would be here for you, I'd get you to
stay with me somehow, someway.
Because I've realized how much I
need you, and the love you gave me.
I need it all so much. I would never
leave you, you would always come
with me and we would be together
all the time. No one will ever replace
you, baby. More like, no one can
replace you. You're irreplaceable,
and I cherish what we had, for I, will
never have that again.”
// i really like this chapter, even if it's sad..
2h

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ Jens POV
Chapter 56 This is where most of my day is spent in the nursery cleaning and organizing, organizing a room with a belly that pops out in front of you is a bit harder than expected. Around 3:00 I decide that I should probably eat something and I should rest because this little girl is moving and kicking like she's going to become a professional soccer player. I grab a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a drink and carefully sit on the couch. I hate being home alone like this. One I just hate being alone but there is literately nothing to do I think to myself as I flip through tv shows until I find one that seem interesting. I reach over for my glass of water and I feel something in my back pop and a sharp pain shoots through my back, my instinct is to stand up. Once I stand up the pain subsides a little bit but it's still there. I place my hand over where it hurts and it hurts to the touch "fuck" I hiss and make my way out to the kitchen with every step I take more pain shoots through my lower back to the top of my shoulders but I just try to ignore it because I believe While I was pregnant with Chloe something similar happened. I try to forget about it by cleaning up Chloe's room but it hurts to move. Eventually I just give up and go and reside to the bed. I must have fallen asleep because I wake up to the sound of the door closing downstairs, I rub my eyes and slowly sit up "ow" I squeak and get up and try to make my walk look as normal as possible because I can't put more stress on josh, he's got a lot going on with the movie he's working on now. As I reach the floor and subtle sound of pain rolls off my lips and josh look over at me and smiles I put on a convincing smile well at least I thought it was. I walk over to the couch where josh sits with Chloe at the coffee table coloring what she had to do for her 'homework'. I sit down and as I do that same pain comes back and I shoot straight back up standing up uncomfortably. "What's wrong" he asks raising his hand for my to take it and he helps me lower myself into the couch "nothing, just my back" I say looking at him.
9h

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ I don't even know what I'm doing with my life right now.
•••
I've been watching a stupid ass tv show.
••
Well I'm writing fanfic to so I guess you guys are getting fanfic.

Ilysm.
//
#joshifer #joshhutcherson #joshiferfanfic #jenniferlawrence #joshhutchersonimagines #prim #primeverdeen #peetamellark #presidentcoin #katnisseverdeen #willowshields #effietrinket #elizabethbanks #woodyharrelson
10h

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joshuarhutcherson_imagine A Love Deeper Than The Ocean.
Part 136 **5 months later** "MAMA!! MAMA!! JOSH!!!" the both of us got waken by a sudden of jumps on our bed. "What? What Sofie?" I yawned rubbing my eyes. Joshs face was still buried into the pillow. "Santa came!! Come on,come on!!" she yanked my arm up,waking me up even more. "Hey! Hey! Careful!" I held my hand over my small 5 month bump. "Sorry,now come on! JOSH!" she body slammed him awake and his jumping reaction was quick and already on his feet. "Alright,alright,I'm up! Let's go,Chrystal!" his voice sounded tired and annoyed. I groaned while pulling myself up and followed my two "kids" downstairs. "LOOK! He brought my tablet!" she showed me the Samsung tablet that was still packed inside the box. "And an electric scooter!" "You must've been real good this year." I smiled,watching her open the rest of her presents. Our house was a complete disaster once she was done. "Why didn't he get the baby anything?" "Well it's not here yet. And no one knows if it's a boy or girl." "But it's clearly a girl. I know it is." I laughed at her sass. "And what makes you so sure?" "Michelle told me." "She what?" Josh said,just getting the news. A few crumbs fell out of his Christmas cookie filled mouth. "When she was over yesterday,she told me it was probably a girl." "She says a lot of things,doesn't mean it's true--" he was saying but then got interrupted by my smacking reflex. "Well Sofie, boy or girl,you're gonna love it just the same." I influenced her. (more in comments)
10h

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ Just by my account, tell me what kind of person you think I am. It doesn't matter is it's mean. Just from my posts what kind of a person do you think I am?😛 //
#joshifer #joshhutcherson #joshiferfanfic #jenniferlawrence #joshhutchersonimagines #prim #peetamellark #primeverdeen #presidentcoin #liamhemsworth #galehawthorne #willowshields #woodyharrelson
11h
  •   _hijacked.everlark_ You're a painter. You're a baker. You like to sleep with the windows open. You never take sugar in your tea. And you always double-knot your shoelaces. 10h
  •   okay.cranky.fandomss You are nice and sweet, but don't like when others are rude/lairs and won't let that happen! 9h
  •   dina.elmezayen @_hijacked.everlark_ WELL DONE MY FRIEND 9h
  •   joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ You are possibly my favorite. @_hijacked.everlark_ 8h
  •   little_welsh_ponies A good writer, Caring, Strong, but you don't like Haters 8h
  •   reading.flawlessly Really nice, optimistic, and U have a very good sense of humor. 8h
  •   sidney_c12 An amazing, flawless, beautiful person who tells it like it is and is very optimistic with a greatbsense of humor. YOUR AMAZING LOVELY!! 8h
  •   _bah6 An awesome writer and person who does what all fangirls do, stalk Jen and josh. But seriously, I think that you're a funny, sweet, caring, awesome, and incredibly cool person and writer with a great sense of humor. 6h

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ Jens POV
Chapter 55 That morning I sit in bed with Chloe reading to me because she has just started 'head start' and is excited about being able to read her books to me. "What time do I go to school" Chloe asks I smile "at 8:30, daddy is getting ready for work so he will take you very soon so let's get you ready pumpkin" I say and poke her belly. I get her a warm outfit because it's December and it's getting cold out. "I getted my book bag packed" she says excitedly and shows me "good job baby" I say and pinch her small cheek. She goes over and starts getting dressed in her school clothes, I do a quick look in her bag to make sure she has a little paper that we did last night and her book. "Chloe" josh calls "coming" she yells back "wait a minute smalls your hair is bed head" I say and sit down in her bed and she sits in a small chair in front of me while I quickly braid it. "Chloe rain" josh says turning into the room and his eyes meet mine "you girls are going to make me late" he says with a chuckle and I finish her braid and she grabs her book bag and runs down the stairs to get her shoes on. I let a sigh fall from my lips and I feel the bed indent next to me and I lean into Josh's body "you going to be okay, I can take today off if I need to" he says and kisses my head "josh your starting in a movie, you can't take a day off" I say and poke his stomach he laughs and helps me up. "Have a good day" I whisper, he bends down and kisses me gently "you rest today" he hums against my lips. I smile then he rushes downstairs and Chloe out the door.
12h

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ I'm probably the most exhausted I've ever been. but I had an amazing night last night so it's worth it. Movies and Netflix is what I want my day to be.
•••
What are you guys doing today?
••
I'm going to end up writing fanfic.

Well guys sitting downstairs with my mom, and watching movies.
//
#joshifer#joshiferfanfic#jenniferlawrence#jenniferlawrenceimagines#joshhutcherson#joshhutchersonimagines#peetamellark#prim#primroseeverdeen#primeverdeen#katnisseverdeen#everlark#everlarkfanfic#effietrinket#elizabethbanks#willowshields#woodyharrelson#haymitchabernathy#liamhemsworth#galehawthorne#mockingjay#catchingfire#thehunergames
13h
  •   cassywall12 Thank you so mych for snapchating me carly you mean the world to me ilysm 13h
  •   ari_liz_fandoms Sounds fun! I'm on the couch. Sick. Again. But you, know, it's okay. How are you feeling? 13h
  •   seaweedgirl13 Carly thank you SOOO much for snap chatting me!! It was great. Sorry I spilled everything though, I had to let go. Thank you so much 13h
  •   rubyslippers16 Fun! I've been sick for about three months and my doctor doesn't really care. So I'll probably just sit around all day. 13h
  •   losjuegosdelhambre1212 F4f?♪ 12h

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jhutchlovesme10 Chapter 10
I did not want to be here, I thought,
as I walked down the hall and into
Dr. Roger's office.
I was sick of our meetings because
I didn't think it helped me at all, nor
did the medications he prescribed
me.
He also interrupts me, which annoys
the crap out of me.
Yet, I still come.
“Hello, Mr. Hutcherson,” he smiled.
“Hey.”
“So, are you ready for our
appointment today?”
“I don't have much of a choice.”
“You do, actually.”
“Not really?”
“Then why do you come, Josh?”
“Because it's supposed to be good
for me.”
“Wrong. You come because if you
weren't here, you'd either be lonely
and mourning over Noel or you would
be doing things you know she
wouldn't approve of you doing if she
were here.”
“You don't know that.”
“I don't, but you do.”
I rolled my eyes in annoyance and
gestured for him to continue with
our session.
“I want you to admit it,” he stated.
“I won't admit it because it isn't true.”
“Oh, yes, it is.”
“No, it's not. You don't know my life.”
“I don't, but I'm a specialist in the
behavior of people. I've seen many
people like you, yet that doesn't
mean you're like them. With your
attitude, I can infer that you probably
do a lot of things that you would've
never done before.”
“You know what? I'm out of here.
I may come back, I may not. Bye.”
“Goodbye Josh, don't get too drunk.”
“Oh, go suck a dick.”
And I stormed out of the room.
I was raging with anger.
How dare he say that all I'm going to
do is go get drunk!
I have friends, and I can hang out
with them if I want.
Maybe I do mourn over Noel, but
someone has to!
She deserves to have someone
missing her, everyone should have
someone like her in your life because
she was the best, nicest person.
She could change you.
She's probably still changing people
up there in heaven because she is
just that great of a person.
So pure, so angelic, that's why she's
my angel.
She loved the sky and now that's
where I see her.
I see her mixed in the clouds, even
though my sky is dark.
I hadn't even realized where I was,
but it was none other than a bar.
I went to the mixer and immediately
ordered a Jack Daniels.
As much as I want to be in heaven
with her, I know I'm going to hell.
1d

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hutchersonbaes Chapter 40
I head directly for the high class car owned by a young man. I'll never be able to afford something like that, but I can pretend it's mine as long as I'm with Josh. Apparently I wasn't the only one with that thought. "I don't remember you having such a sick ride, Josh! How'd you even afford this?" I hear Avan state when I'm closer. "My dad got it for me when I got my license at 16...so three years ago." "Four on October 12th! Oh my gosh! You have exactly one more month of being a teen! "Aye! You remembered!" Josh says with a smile. "Of course I did! Anyway, it's in great shape for three years!" "Thanks. I try," Josh says sarcastically with pride. I walk around to the shotgun side when Josh gets in and reach to grab hold on the handle when a larger and hairier hand beats me to it. Avan. "Oh, Katrina!" I'm expecting him to apologize. He has to know I was there first! Instead he says, "Will you take Clayton for me?" "Don't we need a car seat?" I ask with a hint of annoyance. "Why can't you just hold him on your lap or something?" "That's not safe! Don't you understand?!" ((mic))
1d

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joshuarhutcherson_imagine A Love Deeper Than The Ocean.
Part 135

After dropping Sofie off at her first day of third grade,and stopping by Biscuitville,I drove all the way back to the house and suddenly heard the sound of silence. Connor was still passed out on the couch,Ethan must've went back to Brookes,and Josh was no where downstairs. He was here when I left.. I went upstairs to our bedroom to see him not on our bed,but outside on the balcony looking over the morning beach and bright sun. "Hey,I got us a few biscuits." I said,holding up the Biscuitville bag. "I'll eat in minute. Connor probably wants one." "Party boy is still sleeping." I said,since him,Josh,and Ethan stayed up till past midnight last night doing God knows what. "What are you doing out here?" I asked. "Just thinkin." "Uh oh,about what?" I said and he grinned. "I accepted it." "Accepted what?" "My uncles offer. He's giving us the camp." "What?! Are you serious?! What made you--wait...us?" I caught on and he smiled and nodded. "I wasn't just going to take over the camp without involving you. We're a team now." "So,I...we.. I-I mean we--" I was still trying to process everything he was saying. "WE are now the new owners of Camp Hutcherson." he grinned. "Camp Hutcherson? That's the best you could've came up with?" I joked as he rolled his eyes. "Ok,well you have until December to come up with a new one,smart one." "Fine,I will. What even made you change your mind about this,anyways?" "Well,I thought about it. Owning it will bring in more money,which we will need." he poked my stomach softly as I laughed and rolled my eyes. "And it's only a spring and summer thing. It's not like we'll be busy 24/7. But I will be working a lot more." (more in comments)
1d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ Josh's POV
Chapter 54 "Josh" I hear Jen whisper "are you still awake" she asks "yeah, you okay" I him against the back of her neck "my back really hurts" she whispers. "I know baby, I'll go get you a warming pad" I whisper. I get up and shuffle to the baby blue and pink nursery, yes it's another girl. And I grab a heating pad and as I'm walking past Chloe's room I peak my head in her room and she lays soundly asleep. I silently close the door not wanting to disturb her and walk back into our room where has disappeared. "Jen" I call in a low whisper voice "I'm in here" she answers that's followed the sound of the flush of the toilet and then the sink being turned on. I plugs the heating pad in to get it to the warmness she likes. She appears in the doorway of the bathroom drying her hands. But for someone who is 5 months pregnant she's not huge. And she has no stretch marks because she makes sure that every morning and night she puts lotion on her sides and on her belly. I just take it and rub her back because that's been the one place that has bothered her the most. She sits down next to me and leans into my side, he hands run over her belly and I place my hand over on of hers. "She's going to end up being hyper because I swear this kid never stopes moving" she says with a giggle I kiss her temple "here lay down" I whisper and she complies and lays facing the wall while mess with the cord and the I lay the heating pad on her lower back where she says most of the pain is. "Thank you" she hums dazed with sleep "goodnight, I love you" I whisper and rub the rope of her back until she's soundly asleep then I slowly fall asleep. I wake up to the same sound every morning the sounds Jen quickly getting up and walking quickly to the bathroom. After she finishes throwing up I walk in and rub her shoulder and grab a cup of water and she takes a few sips "this is probably the worst part of being pregnant" she growls burying her face in my shoulder I pull her closer and kiss the top of her head. "It'll all pay off in the end baby" say she nods.
2d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ She's gorgeous.
•••
Well I'm posting the next chapter but I'm going to skip a few months where she is about 5 months pregnant and you can go on their journey with a kid and one on the way.
••
I just wanted to let you all one so you don't get mad when I skip to when she's 5 months along.😛

Okay I'm going to go write now.
//
#joshiferfanifc#joshifer #joshhucherson #jenniferlawrence #joshhutchersonimagines #jenniferlawrenceimagines #prim #peeatmellark #primeverdeen #primroseeverdeen #katnisseverdeen #liamhemsworth #everlark #elizabethbanks #everlarkfanfic #effietrinket#elizabethbanks#willowshields#woodyharrelson #haymitchabernathy #mockingjay #liamhemsworth #cato #catchingfire #alexanderludwig #rue
2d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ There's a few more new ones of Jen but she looks unhappy so I don't think I'll post them.
•••
But how did you all like the last chapter?
••
I am currently laying in bed never wanting to leave my warm blankets.

I don't know what this caption was supposed to mean.
//
#joshifer#hoshiferfanfic#jenniferlawrence#jenniferlawrenceimagines#joshhucherson#joshhutchersonimagines#peeatmellark#katnisseverdeen#liamhemsworth#galehawthorne#rue@willowshields#woodyharrelson#haymitchabernathy#everlark#everlarkfanfic#wffietrinket#elizabethbanks#mockingjay#catchingfire#thehungergames#cato#alexanderludwig#prim#primeverdeen#primroseeverdeen
2d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ Josh's POV
Chapter 53 Long after Jen lays asleep I still find myself staring at the ceiling and running her back gently. I hate when this happens, all my question flow to my brain. I can never answer them. All my fears feel like reality. I can never tell the difference. I feel Jens shift in my arms and then a small sound escapes her lips, I look over and her sleepy blue eyes are looking at me, "why aren't you asleep" she asks me nuzzling closer to me and I let her get as close as she wants, "just thinking" I whisper she keeps her dazed blue eyes trained on me "josh, tonight wasn't your fault, I'm not upset and I hope your not" she hums sleepily "god no, I'm defiantly not upset. I just overthink everything" I say trying to see if what I had just said made any since. I feel her cold fingers pull at the bottom of my shirt "you never sleep with a shirt on" she whispers and with her help we both pull it off over my head. She moves her self up to were we are forehead to forehead I hold her tight to me. "God I seriously love you" I whisper feeling the string of sleep tugging down on me " I love you more" I hear her whisper but is was like she was miles away from me then I fall into oblivion.
2d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ This is probably my favorite out of all the pictures we got of Josh yesterday. it's perfect.
•••
I know I said id post fanfic last night but I got side tracked. Oops.
••
I will write then post it right after I post this picture I promise.

QOTD: Have you guys ever had to stay in the hospital for a long period of time.?
AOTD: Yes.
//
#joshifer #joshhutcherson #joshiferfanfic #jenniferlawrence #jenniferlawrence #joshhutchersonimagines #jenniferlawrenceimagines #joshiferfanfic #liamhemsworth #galehawthorne #prim #peetamellark #peetamellark #primroseeverdeen #primeverdeen #willowshields #woodyharrelson #everlark #woodyharrelson #effietrinket #elizabethbanks #everlarkfanfic #rue#mockingjay #catchingfire #thehungergames #presidentsnow#presidentcoin#cinna
2d

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joshifer._is_obviously_babes_ OMG.
•••
You guys are probably confused on why I didn't post today. One I've been really busy and all my family stopped by my house to say hi to me and stuff. Alexa got her license today, Emerson is sick and Caden is the cool cat of the family because he's laying here watching catching fire with me.
••
Yes that's a lot I know but I just couldn't make time and this is the only time I have to post right now so I'm going to post fanfic also.

I feel like a crappy owner for not posting but I am now so it's be ight. I'm actually really excited for the upcoming chapters I don't really know why I just am.
\\
#joshifer#joshiferfanfic#jenniferlawrence#jenniferlawrenceimagines#joshhutcherson#joshhutchersonimagines#peetamellark#katnisseverdeen#everlark#everlarkfanfic#willowshields#woodyharrelson#prim#primeverdeen#primroseeverdeen#effietrinket#elizabethbanks#mockingjay#catchingfire#thehungergames#liamhemsworth#galehawthorne
2d
  •   beckss4 Don't worry sweety!!! 2d
  •   shienlyangela Don't worry! We are here to support you 2d
  •   dina.elmezayen It's alright if you don't post I can wait dont stress about that we're here for you 2d
  •   ellabellabotsbotsboo Don't worry it's fine your not a crappy owner everyone get busy :) xx 2d
  •   claudiaoshea Don't worry!!! Ur an amazing owner, u never have to be sorry about not posting! We know how busy u r!! 1d

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joshuarhutcherson_imagine A Love Deeper Than The Ocean.
Part 134

A couple weeks,a month at the most,past. Today is my little girls 9th birthday. 9 years ago today,I was rushed into a hospital in Kentucky, went through pain,labor,and birth on my own. It was all worth it,though. I couldn't have asked for a better daughter. The sad thing is though, I couldn't really spend the day with her. I'm so sick,I'm afraid I'll give her my illness. Along with everyone else downstairs at the party. I don't think I'm to contagious. I've just been throwing up all last night and this morning and every time I try to eat something,it comes straight back up. Josh is wondering if I have the flu, but I know that's not it. Flu in the summer? Also,I'm not cold and shivering. My throat is fine. Nose isn't running. It's just my stomach. Which also brings me to another conclusion. A part of me hopes that isn't it. It's to early. We've only been married for 4 months! That's to early,isn't it? At least for a married couple?
Speaking of Josh,I suddenly heard a small knock on my bedroom door. I opened my sleeping eyes to see him walk in. "Hey,you doing ok?" "Yea..I guess." I held my stomach and yawned. "Do you feel like taking more of this?" he handed me the bottle of pink pepto but I pushed it away. "No. It'll just come back up." "Well Sofies about to blow out her candles. You feel like coming down?" he said and I huffed lightly. "I guess I have to." I tried to pull off a healthy smile. (more in comments)
2d

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jhutchlovesme10 Chapter 9
There's a few things I've learned
about death over the past few
months.
Some people are murdered, and
that's honestly one of the worst
ways to die.
Some people die of old age, that's
always how I thought I'd die.
Some die because they are sick,
and that can be taken in two different
ways.
They could be mentally sick or
physically sick.
Mentally can result in suicide, and
unfortunately, many people kill
themselves because they think it
will help others.
I've learned that no matter what you
do or say, you can't just change what
someone thinks about themselves when they are mentally sick.
Especially when struggling with
depression and being self conscious.
Noel was all of these things.
She was depressed, self conscious,
and ashamed of herself.
I recognized these things after awhile
of being with her and it hurt me to
watch her put herself down daily.
She was the most beautiful girl to me,
but when she looked in the mirror,
she saw someone completely
different.
At the age of nine, she was bullied
and the doctors said that had
damaged her for the rest of her life.
Her very short life.
She could've lived with me for so
much longer, I love her with all my
heart.
I miss her so goddamn much and no
one should have to ever feel like they
are so low, but she did.
And it kills me everyday because I
wanted to be the one to save her,
make her feel good about herself,
but I never knew that I or no one
else would ever do that for her.
She had to love herself first, and she
didn't.
I wanted to take the pain away, but I
couldn't and now she's gone.
Somehow, though I know all these
things, I still blame myself because
if I had just made her feel a little bit
better, she may still be here with me.
3d

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joshuarhutcherson_imagine A Love Deeper Than The Ocean.
Part 133

A very lonely afternoon went by until around 5:15 when the front door shot open,distracting me from my cooking. I didn't know if I should've been excited or confused when Josh and Sofie ran inside the house soaking wet and both in their bathing suits covered with a towel. "About time! I missed you!" I ran into my cold daughters arms. "I had so much fun this year!" "I can tell. Why are y'all so wet?!" I finally asked. "After everyone went home,I took Sofie down to the lake." Josh said,throwing both of their towels into the washer. "The lake?!" "Yea! And dadd--I mean Josh felt a snake too and screamed like a girl!" she laughed and so did I,imagining that happening. "I did not! I simply told you to get out of the water in a.. loudly..fashion!" he took a swallow of his Coke as I rolled my eyes. "Well, that's one reason why I don't like lakes. Come on,let's go get your bath going before dinner." I said heading towards the stairs but then her energetic-self ran out in front of me. "I think I'll take a shower instead." "Alright,then I'll get your water going--" "No,I can do it." she paced herself up the steps. "Oh--are--are you sure?" "Yes,mommy,I'm almost nine! I can do it myself!" she exclaimed and my eyes widened not only in shock but in rejectment. Josh even almost choked on his soda from laughing at her sassiness. "Well,she told you!" "She's growing up to fast!" "Just because she wants to run her own shower?" "No. For not needing me. There's no telling when she'll stop calling me 'mommy'." (more in comments)
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