theonion Party Guest Hoping #Birthday Card With Shirtless Hunk Taken In Playful Spirit With Which It Was Intended #TheOnion 23h

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theonion Scientists Make Unclear Breakthrough After Giving Robot Cancer #TheOnion 1d

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theonion #FIFA Assures Fans Investigation Won’t Affect 2022 Qatar Slush Fund #TheOnion 1d

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theonion Fire Department Deploys Unmarked Trucks #TheOnion 2d

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theonion Report: Underpaid Migrant Laborers Working 18 Hours Per Day On #FIFA Legal Defense #TheOnion #WorldCup #soccer 2d

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theonion Olay Getting Women To Drop Guard With Few Nonjudgmental Ads Before Nailing Them With Body Shame #TheOnion #ads #beauty 2d

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theonion GM Announces Plans To Recall Driverless #Car By 2021 #TheOnion 2d

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theonion Report: #Dad Wants To Show You Where Fuse Box Is #TheOnion 2d

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theonion #FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer #WorldCup In United States #TheOnion #soccer 3d

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theonion Alarming Report Finds Hundreds Of Items Still Not Available In S’Mores #TheOnion #food 3d

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theonion #Roommates Assured #Girlfriend Only Staying Over For Entire Duration Of Relationship #TheOnion 3d

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theonion 2.8-Million-Year-Old Cycle Of Human Cruelty Continues Unabated On Elementary School Playground #TheOnion #children 4d

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theonion Parents Clinging To Lone Religious Element Of Daughter’s Wedding Ceremony #TheOnion #Wedding 4d

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theonion Man Confident Perfect Dating App Waiting For Him Out There Somewhere #TheOnion #dating 4d

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theonion Police Assure Residents Kidnapping Was Only One Of Those Custody-Related Ones #TheOnion #crime #kidnapped 4d

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theonion Industrious Otters Now Capitalizing On Oil Spills #TheOnion 1w

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