thegermaine I've always wanted to go to Santorini purely to take this one photo. Which I have now done ️ I'll die a happy bunny πŸ˜€
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7d
  •   thegermaine @ladytamaya I have clips on my other personal account which I'll tag you in, they're quite far down so it'll take me a while to find, I'm at work at the moment so bear with me! 4d
  •   sunemilysun Gorgeous! 4d
  •   bazza_nl And it's a stunning photo indeed! 4d
  •   ibrahimbarhoumi_ Nice 4d
  •   ibrahimbarhoumi_ Hey thegermaine can you follow my friend stripedslap he's awesome and really likes your profile and I wanted to surprise him with you following him he might even freak out lol but you don't have to if you don't want too I just wanna surprise him 4d
  •   dllilien 3d
  •   stripedslap What is ibrahimbarhoumi doing 3d
  •   theeepaul #worthit, right? 2d

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine So a few weeks ago my cousin popped out a beast from her womb and this was the result. Unfortunately the infant is, well, slightly, hmmm, erm, a little bit, ok it's ugly. I've reassured my cousin that he'll grow into his second cousin Sam's youthful handsome good looks so there's hope yet
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1w

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine I have real issues with the parasol at the bottom of this photo. Blatantly put there on purpose by the owner of it to ruin everybody's photos. When I go back, I will dowse it in petrol and set it alight. That'll show it
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2w

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thegermaine P erfect
O range
P rotruding
P endulum
Y oghurt

Thanks for listening to my poem
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2w

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine Nice little Greek alleyway for you. Not much to say about it really. Kinda boring but I quite like it. Sort of thing you see in a photo frame when you buy it just before screwing it up, throwing it away and placing in it, instead, a blurry photo of your dead dog. I'm glad to be back from holiday
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3w
  •   soladood Such a bright place Greece ....but I've only seen it in the movies - and 2nd hand knowledge from 2 previous Greek girlfriends 2w
  •   insta_flower1337 For me...it would be a picture of my dead cat. Laughing. I actually love it...takes me back to when I walked a few streets just likethis.. in Greece... a few months ago. 2w
  •   bruceeee Cracking shot Grommit & welcome back to sunny England! 2w
  •   scoochymcnugget Cleanest prettiest alley way I've ever seen 2w
  •   linaka1 Looks like an alley that you could be run in and then splat!!!! You hit the wall. 2w
  •   nur_khamdah I find peace here 2w
  •   worberb Beauty 2w
  •   griffinchc Beautiful! 2w

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thegermaine I only posted this photo of Ian, David and Simon assembling my apps to prove that I have friends- you see? One whole message on the 'messages' icon ️️️ I still haven't read it because it's making me feel wanted. I am pretty. I am pretty. I am pretty
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3w
  •   thegermaine @linaka1 I will make a photo involving that consider it done 2w
  •   linaka1 Yippee!!!!! I can't wait! 2w
  •   nappyc Freaking awesome 2w
  •   worberb Fantastic 2w
  •   thegermaine @worberb who is this? Walking down the catwalk- not only the prettiest and the sexiest lady in all the land, but the kindest and most complimentary Bobosaurus Sex 2w
  •   worberb Hahahahaha 2w
  •   griffinchc Awesome! 2w
  •   sunemilysun Splendid! 4d

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thegermaine Hello there, fellow sky companion
Hmmm what do you want? You are just a cloud ️
Oh that's not very kind I was only being nice πŸ˜€
You are not in my league. You are a cloud. I am the sun ️
But I'm higher than you πŸ˜€
That is just a matter of opinion 😐
Where you going, sun?? 😦😦
I'm setting. Goodbye
Come back, sun!! ️
Piss off CLOUD!!!!!!
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3w

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thegermaine How about a bit of pretentious, Greek minimalism for you? Because I am in Greece. If I was going to be REALLY pretentious, I would write this caption in Greek. But I will just say 'pitta bread, please'. ️️️️️
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4w

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thegermaine Oooh Roger, now that IS a big one! It looks scary, I've never rode one as long as that! Darling, you'll be fine. Now, what about the rollercoaster? .
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1mon

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thegermaine Oh phew Panic over. I was starting to become psychotic
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1mon

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine This pleases me. It pleases me so much I'd like to bathe in it. In fact I took it while I was in the bath. So I kinda did 😎Yolo
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1mon

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine This is what it's like when dwarves suffer an earthquake (no dwarf emoji, sadly)
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By the way, if you are a dwarf and are offended by my caption, then I am truly sorry that your arms are not quite wings
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1mon

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thegermaine Imagine if you cracked open a can of coke and there was a salmon in it. This thought is something that amuses me a lot. I was in Tesco a few weeks ago and I imagined opening a nice cold can of Coca-Cola expecting my thirst to be quenched and instead being disappointed to find a salmon staring up at me. I began laughing so much I went and stared at some minced beef while I calmed down so I didn't look weird
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1mon

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thegermaine I found a new sexy solo tree the other day, on the right is evidence of her skiing practice. She's quite accomplished Her name is Joanne the Ski Queen and her favourite bird is a cow
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1mon

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thegermaine Excuse me! Yes! You there!
Have you seen my oars?! 🚣
No? What does it look like? Is it a shire or a Shetland?
No!! My OARS!! 🚣🚣🚣
I don't understand Why would you need a horse when you're rowing?? Surely you would need oars! 🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣
That's what I said! I can't be captain of this fine vessel without oars! 🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣
I see! Well what do they look like?? Are they OARange? OAR are they OARnaments?
Don't be ridiculous! I'm drowning here!
Oh, you can borrow my oar if you like but I only have one... 🚣
Yes! Thank you!
Excuse me! Have you seen my oar???🚣
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1mon

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine One of those photos usually followed by some lame caption such as 'Sunset Glow' or 'Golden Haze', so I shall entitle this photo: Sparrow Shit ️
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1mon

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine Oh crap. Whatever you do, don't tell your dad I've murdered your uncle Karl.😢It was only meant to be a slap round the face but then I remembered how he looked up my skirt at my coronation party.You just don't do that to a queen! Do you? Oh why am I asking you? You're deaf. A deaf little pawn. I hate you and now you have no uncle. See? You can't even hear me. Clean up this mess and hide the body in the castle, the bishop will take care of it. Never mind I'll do it
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2mon

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Normal _Sam 😎
thegermaine Phwoar. Dat ass doh
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2mon

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