sashacheeks Holy shit look at what my dreams did to my hairs.
..happy to have today off. I've been such a tired girl.
2d

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sashacheeks I have a lot of past that I don't like to talk about. It has pushed away some of my favorite people and brang only some of the best closer to love me through all of my embarrassment.
I have believed in healing, and I believe in faith, and I believe in having a good heart... Sometimes I feel the worst of feelings when all my hard work has not paid off, and when the loneliness kicks in... but in moments like this I am reminded that just because one door won't open and ten others stay locked, it is not worth giving up. Worth letting the fear consume you and the hurt fill your heart.
2 years ago I admitted myself into the emergency room at Portland Providence to be observed in the hopes of being diagnosed and prescribed the perfect concoction to cure all the ailments I felt so heavy in my brain that have consumed me for 27 years. After 7 days I was prescribed a number of medications including Lithium, Seroquel, Latuda, Ativan and many more.
a part of me appreciates the help I chose to get for saving me from some of my darkest memories, but the whole of me believes I just needed to get through it somehow, and I couldn't do it alone.
After 1 year my symptoms progressed, the numbness I felt had faded away, my doses were prescribed stronger and I no longer wanted to be on any medication. I missed all the fear I felt. I missed all the sadness. I missed feeling all together...
So I stopped, faster than I should have, but just as fast as I needed to.
I found eastern medicine and the cure of Love and just wanted to give it back to the whole entire world... These last few days my heart and mind can't seem to find its balance.
I am realizing that I need to find the core root of the problem, and maybe it is always wanting to run away... wanting to find my Home.
But the more I think about it, The more I feel about it.. maybe my home has never been a place... Maybe my home has been in all the hearts that I have met along the way. That have healed my soul.. The home in Me.

Thank you all for holding my heart in your porcelain hands... For all your kindness. And for all of your Love.

I only hope to be that back to You. In this life, and the next.
3d

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sashacheeks It's a great Sunday 5d

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sashacheeks And I'm just a creep.... @lisaholtman 1w

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sashacheeks hope those are raw dawgs.. #happynationaldogday and #wcw 1w

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sashacheeks My baby sister just took me to church.. @charity_billings 1w
  •   charity_billings That's right! SLOTHs are OUR FRIENDS NOT THE ENEMY 1w
  •   xodoe I'm literally addicted to that app 1w

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sashacheeks #flashbackmonday to when I was blessed enough to be asked to sing for the first dance at my Uncles wedding that I had never met and my thick thighs almost let my vagina fall out. #amen 2w

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sashacheeks Meditating on this today. 2w

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sashacheeks hey check out my brother. Hes got a best friend too. @calebillings 2w

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sashacheeks Usually it t4kes a feeling to get there. 2w

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sashacheeks Oh my glob I really yam turning into my Mother. 2w

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  •   mikey_loney Mike Tyson style! Dats impeccable! 2w
  •   sashacheeks god you're thutch a dick111!!! @mikey_loney 2w
  •   mikey_loney I was about to correct your gramma than I read it again. Thasha for thu win! Real upscale sarcasm. 5d

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sashacheeks Somebody's an artist. 2w

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sashacheeks Got a new mop... Trying to convince the shop to let me bring it in. 2w

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sashacheeks There's a lot of different kinds of crazy out there... I am learning to finally love mine. 2w

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sashacheeks Missed this stuff. 2w

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sashacheeks My phone just started steaming up. #mcm 3w

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