missaj89 Because Disney can cure the most horrible days.
I've lived inside a 14 years old body and mind the last days. To find an old photo of myself triggered back so many old painful memories and feelings. Right now i feel so small, so incredible worthless. All i am is a burden to society and everyone around me.
But i'm working my ass off to disprove all this.
But right now my 14y old self needs disney movies to cope with my feelings, with my teddy bear in my arms to protect me. Because she needs to feel protected and loved. Because she IS worth so much more than she gives her self credit for. She's better than all her bullies. Combined.
So until my 14y old self disappears again and i get my body back, i will take care of you👭. Because you deserve everything good in this world.
5d

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Normal AnnJ .25y. Norway
missaj89 Ten points to me for being social today! 3w

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missaj89 Me and Marta wish all our instafriends a happy easter!!🌞 Enjoy yourselves and take good care of each other
I myself am inpatient this easter, so i'm gonna relax as much as possible and read books
3w

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missaj89 Rewarding myself,and calming down, with a delicious latte after a session of trauma therapy. Can't wait to get home to take a long power nap! I'm so exhausted that i could fall asleep in standing position!😴 Wish you all a nice day🌞 1mon

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2mon missaj89
Normal AnnJ .25y. Norway

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2mon missaj89
Crema AnnJ .25y. Norway
missaj89 She's keeping a very close eye on my cooking skills.. It's a tough job that requires a lot of patience, and big passion for food! 2mon

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missaj89 Look what i just found!! One of the first videos i took of baby Marta! I'm tearing up just looking at this.. (and hooray for 2007 cellphone quality..!) 2mon

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2mon missaj89
Crema AnnJ .25y. Norway
missaj89 Happy Friday everyone! Raise your hand (or paw) if you gonna sleep all weekend 2mon

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3mon missaj89
Crema AnnJ .25y. Norway
missaj89 Fordi, når livet er ekstra sårt, er dette helt lov. Det er faktisk en uskreven regel det! 3mon

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missaj89 What anxiety and depression does to you; Steals all your energy, refuse you to sleep, kicks you in your stomach and makes you hyperventilate through several panic attacks. And when you're finally calm again, sadness takes over and fill you with so much self hate, trying to convince you that you deserve to die.
It's been days since i had the strength to even take a shower, just because i'm too exhausted.
The reason i'm posting this shameful rant is because i want to share how it really is, how bad days are. I've often been told to "think positive. Go outside, socialize with people. You're being over dramatic." Or the one that hurts the most; "you've got at least try to work with it/make it better". Like i like to live like this. Like i'm glad i'm wasting my life, and will most likely never have a "normal life".
All i want is to just try to explain this. I'm not lazy, i don't lie on the couch all day sleeping. From the moment i wake up in the morning i start working. And when i finally fall asleep at night, that's when i get off work.
Don't judge me. Because here i am today, alive. And that achievement is something that no one never can take away from me!
Family, friends; Thank you for your patience with me. I love you
3mon

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3mon missaj89
Normal AnnJ .25y. Norway
missaj89 Excuse me you weird creature, but is it possible to ask for some crumbs..? 3mon

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missaj89 A picture that describes my entire weekend!. It's almost a brand new week with a clean slate, and a long and stupid week can finally be put away. It has been a week filled with a lot of pain and hopelessness, with minimal of sleep that has worsened my dissociation. I almost got admitted couple of days ago because I was too sick to be left home alone, but after a few hours at the e.r, i could luckily go home. It scares me more having to go back on the closed ward, than actually having to stand through this. I really want to handle this myself. Working with post traumatic disorder is a shitty job. But for each day i manage to get through, the faster it goes until I can get well and healthy again.
So I'll try to treat you better, new week.
3mon

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