livapple watch me lose my mind 21h

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livapple like a vagabond I strayed from ond place to another, without noticing that I was running circles, I betrayed you, I lied to you, but only ever to come crawling back to you regretting.
I wanted to have my freedom and expected you to stay where you are, I wanted you to loosen your grip but now you let go - all of a sudden - and I am free, free falling.
A lifetime in fast motion, nothing good ever lasts long.
I remember crying in your arms, your solid voice promising me that I'll find my way, because I'm worth it.
But now you're gone, all there is left are flashbacks of moments I believed to be forgotten
- L.
2w

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livapple I was foolish to start believing in this, I always knew this is a man-made concept 2w

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livapple there's this tune I found it makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat 2w

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livapple have you got colour in your cheeks 2w

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livapple walls spinning
my head gets heavier
the heart racing
with trembling voice
and shaking hands
one-word-answers only
thoughts swirling
sending shivers down my spine
twitching feet
I need to leave this building
before my vision turns to black
/
I get up
short breath
uncontrolled gestures
mumble something
leave the room
trying not to stumble
/
fresh air
deep inhalation
still shaking
the horror of returning
already on my mind
- L.
3w

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livapple we have forgotten all about young love's joy 4w

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livapple now it's time to leave the capsule if you dare 4w

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livapple Day 16, I think I'm starting to forget about you. Your flowers are still on the windowsill. I decided to observe their process of becoming ashes and dust. Over the past few days I've come to the realization that I was a fool to believe that someone else could complete me. You're not born human. Life itself is the process of becoming one, wholly in its existence. Of course I miss your touch, but eventually I freed myself from the belief, that I need you for the sake of my own happiness.
- L. #thingsIwouldhavetoldyou
4w

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livapple The video from my stay in #Faro #Portugal is now up on my vimeo! Link is in my bio 1mon

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livapple One of the most fascinating human beings I've ever met in my life. 1mon

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livapple I looked up at a street lamp. Blinding light. I swallowed the lump in my throat and tried to think of something to say, but again, nothing but tears. He hugged me, in the middle of the pathway. The few people who passed by seemed to mind their own business. 25th of December, what were they doing out in the cold streets of a winter night anyway. I looked at the theatre building, at the closed stores on the other side of the river. I thought of all these things we've experienced within these three months. How could I've been so stupid to forget. "You're seventeen. My god, seventeen. And you've been through so much already, have explored parts of your mind most people don't even know they exist."
- L.
1mon

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livapple Day one, Today I felt the cold air, like a dagger being pushed through my chest.
I haven't told anyone how much I miss you. I try to take good care of myself. I fail, so miserably. I surround myself with people I love, it doesn't help.
- L. #thingsIwouldhavetoldyou
1mon

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livapple But I wish there was something you would do or say
To try and make me change my mind and stay
But we never did too much talking anyway
But don't think twice, it's all right. #dylan
1mon

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livapple I am feeling supersonic
give me gin and tonic
you can have it all but
how much do you want it?
#oasis #supersonic
this artwork is now available on my website!
2mon

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livapple if we could start over again 2mon

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livapple it's not even tragedy anymore, it's numbness, the hollow emptiness of numbness. Eyes clear but vision clouded, where am I going?
- L.
2mon

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livapple the story of how two people lost themselves in the heat of it all, took time for granted when it was long running out
there we go, your paradigm of vanity folded out in front of us, we don't know if we've ever been anything else but strangers. The tension is so thick I can hardly breathe, this has to stop.
- L.
2mon

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livapple I've been through my personal hell, thinking I could never get any worse. But then you'll find yourself looking at your life again, from a very new perspective, and suddenly your body aches in places you didn't even know existed and your mind screams in tones you would've never imagined to hear.
So here I sit and I cry in languages misunderstood to which people are responding with bewildered looks.
- L.
2mon

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