justwantaskinnybody Hello my beautiful followers! I haven't posted anything since a lot of time, and I actually deleted all my photos months ago when I decided I wanted to #recovery. But here I am, so something has changed. At the beginning everything was ok, I tried to eat healthy, but now I've gained too much #weight, I feel so ugly and #fat and my mom who keeps telling me to weigh myself (I haven't done it since a lot to stop caring about numbers) is not helping. To the ones who are wondering how I could manage the first period without counting calories etc, I have to say I took my insecurities from food to a life style based on alcohol, cigarettes and weed. Yes, I've been through awful moments, my friends all together during a party and me sitting on a chair trying not to throw up and failing. I drove my car high with my high friends telling me where to go and I still don't remember the streets I drove by. Anyways here I am, probably I won't post a lot but I wanted to share this with somebody. I'll start counting #calories again and I'll be fucking skinny, no matter what I'll have to do to succeed. Hope you guys are ok, love you #ana #ed #mia #anorexia #starve 2y

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