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jellyfishrhythm Hey lady, don't think I don't see you trying to steal that poop I just left there. #sideeye #chorkie #instadog #poopninja 2d

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jellyfishrhythm Timeout: @allison8800, my heterosexual life mate, my best friend (pal and confidant), turns 30 today. I want to wish you the happiest of happy birthdays - I love you more than I could ever accurately put into words, and may 30 be as kind to you as I know it will be to me! I think I may opt for another surgery juuuuust to get you back down here all to myself for a week to make me sandwiches, take care of me, and watch horrid VH1 dating shows with me. We've seen a lot of life together, and I look forward to all of the (bug filled) adventures to come. You make me a better person, and for that, I'm eternally grateful. And now, I ask you this: what's it gonna be, Kyle? Tits? ....or destiny?

#bestfriends #instabirthday #dirty30 #onesmallcarrotjuice #staygolden #roadtrippinwithmyfavoriteally #crazycatladies
2d
  •   allison8800 ..........tits.
    Love you so hard. Thank you :-) 2d

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jellyfishrhythm My sexy husband engaging in the equally sexy activity of donating to the #berniesanders campaign (the website is running very slowly due to heavy traffic...surprised?). We #feelthebern in this house, and we believe in his #politicalrevolution. #27dollars #campaignfinancereform #believe 3d

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jellyfishrhythm Feeling awful today. Delayed post-op pain. The only prescription? Charbear snuggles. #loveofmylife #adoptdontshop #instadog 4d

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jellyfishrhythm My precious and precocious nephew practicing hard for when he becomes a big brother in July :) #instababy 5d

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jellyfishrhythm Amen.
My friends give EXCELLENT birthday gifts (this is the tip of the iceberg, guys)
@nealthea & @ronnyhasabeard are wonderful people, and anyone who knows them should feel lucky. Here's to 30: so far, so good.
#dirty30 #fuckcancer #friendz
2w

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jellyfishrhythm My (amazing) sister-in-law and (equally amazing) mother-in-law baked me this otherworldly birthday cake today - it's 3 layers of FUDGE BROWINE, with...wait for it...wait for it...COOKIE DOUGH FILLING...iced in chocolate, doused in sprinkles. Enjoy getting diabetes from ogling this photo. I know I am. I married into a pretty rad family, y'all. #whatdiet? #nofilter #sweettooth #dirty30 2w
  •   dxgenie Omg I need this in my life 2w
  •   dxgenie Tell them send me the recipe 2w
  •   carelizapple I really *need* this recipe too. Please share it! 2w
  •   carelizapple And happy birthday! 🏻🏽 2w

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jellyfishrhythm My poor darling husband...can't say he's married to a girl in her 20's anymore. #oldanddecrepit #birthdayselfie 2w

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