ilisanlavi Hiking today:) So did not pose, this picture was candid ;) 3d

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ilisanlavi My scars tell a story. They are a reminder of times when life tried to break me, but failed. They are markings of where the structure of my character was welded. Today marks 1 year since I had knee surgery. This past year has taught me how important using our feet are. I was stuck in bed for 2 weeks after surgery since I got a horrible infection and couldn't even stand up for 10 seconds or I felt like I was going to fall to the floor and pass out. I was on crutches for 2 months after surgery since my knee started taking a toll on me. Through all of this I knew there would be a day when it will all get better and I'd be able to run again. Now 1 year later I'm still strengthening my knee. There are times when I have such bad pain I have to just relax. There's times when it hurts so bad I can put any weight on it. But I know there will be a day when I won't have that pain anymore, and I'll be able to run. This has been an experience I will never forget! 2 torn muscles, 1 popped blood vessel, torn ACL, torn MCL and dislocation of my knee 3 times. I have 3 scars on my knee and 2 scars on my thigh. The dr told me that for the rest of my life when I'm not careful playing around its highly likely for me to tare my MCL again. I have torn it again, but now it's getting better and I'm not letting this stop me from walking, jogging or running! :) 6d

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ilisanlavi Afternoon walks and kisses #auntieniecelove 7d

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ilisanlavi •Seattle• 1w

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ilisanlavi Fun with the kiddos 😛 #vacation #siblingtime 2w

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ilisanlavi Happy birthday to my best friend! #loveyou 2w

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ilisanlavi Hiking today😛 #siblings #pnw #mybrother 2w

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ilisanlavi Happy 21st birthday to me! #mybirthday 1mon

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ilisanlavi Happy birthday to my sister Melisa! #15 #tbt #chicago #sisterlove 1mon

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ilisanlavi I don't want to cry anymore, my body feels numb. Monday I just sat in the bed by him starring at him. Looking at his face almost counting all his hairs. My body went numb, I don't want to feel the pain anymore. It hurts, it really hurts. I have been sleeping with my grandma in bed on my grandpas side starring at the celling seeing how much our lives are changing. Thinking how I will never see him again smile at me, thinking how he will never be Physically with us at Sunday family lunch.. I'm happy the last words I got to tell him were "I love you" but my heart feels broken. I keep staring at pictures of him I smile than I cry and I smile again. When I walked into the room to see him I just went numb my uncle came and hugged me so tight and I started balling in his arms. It really hurts. I know it's something we all have to go through in life, and I wish that we all see each other again in heaven. The first night when I laid in bed I starred at the picture on the wall of him and I smiled and just my right hand got all warm. It's like I felt him there by me telling me he is fine and to smile. I need to be strong, I know but it's hard. I laid in bed smiling at the picture than I'd cry, and smile again.
I cried Monday so hard I felt like I was about to faint, my body got all hot and I fell back into my chair and it got hard to breath. I couldn't speak for a minute there, I just sat and starred at the ceiling trying to calm down. It really hurts. I laid in bed by him for atleast a hour just staring at him and holding his hand. It was cold, but my body was so hot that I felt just fine sitting by him. My body went numb and I felt fine looking at him, I was fixing his hair and just starring at him. Looking at how handsome my grandfather is, I have his eyes and it makes me happy having a physical part that looks like him. I see a part of him in all the kids, either the eyes, the nose, the big ears. I see him in all of us, even though I won't see or feel him again physically this is making me strive more to be a better person so we can all meet in heaven. I know he has no pain and is walking the streets of gold right now he is so happy up there.
2mon
  •   ilisanlavi I'm happy that he turned his life around and that he is in heaven with no pain and is so happy up there. I know there will be a day when we will all see each other again. Now it hurts but it will get easier..I'm happy that God gave us 15 months after he was diagnosed so we can spend with him. There's up's and down's but this is the life we have. I miss him but I feel comfort knowing he is ok and that we will see each other again. I love that the last words we shared were "I love you" I will be fine soon, but it's still all sinking in.... #iloveyouforever #ripdad #mygrandfather 2mon
  •   anasecrian I'm sorry Lavi :( I lost my grandpa too and it was the worst feeling ever. May God give you guys comfort 2mon
  •   la_915 I'm so sorry for your loss 2mon
  •   myangel120314 Stay strong sweetie !! I know it hurts I know I know. Time won't heal, this is not true. But you'll just accept the fact that the person is gone and it's something you'll learn how to live with. !! other then that time doesn't heal. U can't heal from loosing someone you loved so dearly. I'm just being honest hun, I know how this feels. This very moment. .. take care of urself and family, it's most important to stay strong. And it's okay to cry, trust me. It's a normal grieving process. 2mon

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2mon ilisanlavi
Normal Lavinia Ilisan
ilisanlavi Great dream I had last night, - I was laying on my Grandparents bed on my Grandfathers side and I was crying, my Grandfather than walks through the door. He looked so good and healthy, his skin was glowing he looked perfect in white. And I asked him "Dad why did you leave?" And he responded with "Lavi you need to stop crying and you need to smile. I'm fine." He started walking towards me and he had the biggest smile on his face. The best dream️ he looked strong and healthy! #imissyou #iloveyou #ripdad #iloveyouforever 2mon

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ilisanlavi •I LOVE YOU• I'm trying my hardest to stay strong but it hurts. I find comfort knowing your not in pain anymore, That I will see you again one day! I miss you already so much!! Our last picture together me holding your hand #mygrandfather #heisveryhandsome #rip #iloveyouforever #untilwemeetagain 2mon
  •   stefan_rosca Condolence to you and the rest of the family. Va pup pe toți si m-a rog pentru voi. 2mon
  •   ilisanlavi Thank you! I'm cherishing all our memories, that's what's keeping me going️ your words are very sweet and I do really appreciate it! May God give you the strength from your loss too! I didn't know Alex but I know galina and my heart broke when I heard what happened. May god give us all the strength to get past these hard times and to look into what a bright future we will all have when we enter the gates of heaven, walking the streets of gold with our loved ones. I look forward to that day we we see everyone we have lost and there will be no more sorrow and no more pain!! @myangel120314 2mon
  •   ilisanlavi Thank you ladies! I really do appreciate it! @jeseeeeka @oressabogdan @andrea.daniliuc @debbiebora777 thank you jr, it truly does mean a lot!! @stefan_rosca 2mon
  •   myangel120314 THANK U Darling !! Means a lot. .it's the hardest thing I've been through in life. && I'm trying to do my best to help galichka and the family ! 😧 i know how much they all loved hik and so do I !! and ur welcome, u stay strong. Keep smiling, your gorgeous hun. And ur right , "there will be a day with no more tears , no more pain and no more fears " 2mon
  •   ilisanlavi It truly is the hardest thing!!! stay strong beautiful! @myangel120314 2mon
  •   myangel120314 U stay strong too darling !! 😙 2mon
  •   andreea_poanta Condolences to you and your family. May God be with you all! Stay strong. Hugs from us! 2mon
  •   ilisanlavi Thank you! @andreea_poanta 2mon

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ilisanlavi I LOVE you, i MISS you, I WANT you BACK. But I know that you aren't suffering anymore and you are rejoicing up in heaven. This has been the worst Monday one can have starting the new year, at the same time it's the best Monday for you since you got to go back home to our savior. My heart aches, it feels like it's been ripped out of my chest. I feel like my bones are all crumbling. I can't take the pain, but than I think of how happy you are and it gives me hope!.. I think of all the memories I have with you, growing up with you. Coming over everyday, going into the garden and popping all the flowers and you would come after me telling me that I need to stop cause you planted them for mom. I remember the last words you told me last week, "lavi it really hurts" I hugged you and than you told me "I love you lavi" and it broke my heart I cry now, but I know it will be better one day. Until the day we meet again! I LOVE AND MISS YOU DAD! RIP
#mygrandfather #rip #iloveyouforever
2mon

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ilisanlavi "Girls just wanna have fun" #bestfriend #loveisintheair 2mon

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ilisanlavi How i like to start my new year, odd and upside down #2015 #merrychristmas #easter 2mon

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ilisanlavi My loves came to be with me for NEW YEARS #happynewyears 2mon
  •   stefan_rosca What? I want to be in the picture. Well to all you over there. Happy new year. 2mon

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