foreverdieting This week so far! Did an Alice in Wonderland theme. 19h

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foreverdieting This is my current Filofax collection (minus my Original which is STILL not here... ). But my collection is due to become a lot smaller. ALL but one of these Filofaxes (my beautiful Malden) are being sold on eBay (UK site). From top to bottom: Kensington; Domino; Hamilton; Finsbury; Malden; Kendal. (P.s. My eBay username is brixtonbriefcase) 1d
  •   owright93 Argh I don't know how to search by username on eBay :(((( 22h
  •   foreverdieting @owright93 On Facebook I posted the actual link to each listing on the UKPA page & the FF & Pens For Sale page! 22h
  •   lydiasjourney How do I search y8u on ebay lovely xx 10h
  •   foreverdieting @lydiasjourney @owright93 just looked it up how to search a seller on eBay. You click "advanced" next to the search bar at the top of the page. Then select "by seller" & then you should be able to type my eBay name in & find my things! 9h

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foreverdieting My available Starbucks cards for trade! 1d

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foreverdieting @justkeeppinning #justkeeppinningxmas1000 thank you for hosting such a cute giveaway!! 2d

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foreverdieting Thank you @inthelifeoflolza & @borderlinerecovery for the tags! So, here's 20 not so interesting facts about me:
1. I live in Salisbury, Wiltshire - home of Salisbury Cathedral & Stonehenge.
2. I drive a little Peugeot 107. Been driving since May 2010.
3. I have been penpalling for a few months now & currently have 11 penpals.
4. I am in a long term happy relationship with my lovely boyfriend, Jago (@foreverfootball).
5. I have a serious stationary addiction & spend like a 3rd or so of my wages each month on the stuff!
6. I am a (very) crazy cat lady!
7. I love going to car boot sales and charity shops! Never know what treasures you may find.
8. I truly believe I am the laziest 21 year old on this earth.
9. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in April 2013. This past year has by far been the most difficult.
10. I am a massive caffeine junkie. Nothing beats a Monster energy drink!
11. I love my Filofaxes! I'm currently in a pocket size grey Malden, but I'm awaiting my personal size monochrome Original to arrive to me in the post & I'll be moving into that!
12. I am extremely impatient. If I want something I want it there & then, hence why I suck at cooking and will often undercook foods on purpose cos I hate waiting.
13. I LOVE Instagram. I am on it 24/7. I just love the freedom it gives me to express myself and I love the little community of people I've met through it and I'm so thankful for all of their support. Hopefully made some friends for life!
14. I am 5ft1.5" with small hands and size 3/4 feet! Just wish the rest of me was small to match!
15. I hate to just give or throw things away. I always try to sell pretty much everything before I get rid of it, either through eBay or through boot sales.
16. My favourite colours are black, lime green and pink.
17. I have a pet doggie (border collie) named Willow and a pet kitty (tortoise shell) called Muesli.
18. I collect quite a few things: cute things with cats on; keyrings; washis; Starbucks cards; and stamps.
19. I am half English and half American!
20. I am a Pescitarian (I eat fish but not meat, although I rarely have fish anymore).
3d

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foreverdieting Baklava cos I am fat, sad & have no willpower. 3d

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foreverdieting YAAAY! Finally found somewhere in Salisbury that sells Peanut Hottie! 3d

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foreverdieting I feel like I am literally going fucking crazy. Life & "reality" does not feel real & it's driving me fucking insane. Why the fuck are we all even here anyway? & why is everything the way it is? Why do I own all these shitty things & why do I look the way I do? I can't stop questioning fucking everything. Maybe "life" is just a made up thing in my head. Maybe no one actually exists. Maybe I don't? I don't know. Questions like these drive me mad. I feel like my mind is overheating & it may explode. You all may think I'm a freak & I'm probably giving you all a good laugh here (especially you who I know who likes to read all my posts although you don't follow me & have a good laugh about it with your sibling - hope life's treating you good, asshole), but it's making me feel helpless. Time is going past so fast & I feel so lost in this world & I can't stand it. Anxiety is high. 3d
  •   papermaillove Overthinking is the worst :( have you tried focusing your brain on something else? Preferably enjoyable and none stressful! Penpalling/crafting does wonders for me in situations like this xxx 3d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove I've finally moved off of the living room floor after an hour of being sat/led there just thinking & I've put on Disney's Cars to try & distract me :( meant to be going to a car boot sale in the morning. I am gunna be exhausted :( xxx 3d

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foreverdieting I cannot stop eating. Fuck my life. I hate being so stressed constantly. 3d

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foreverdieting My ASL ice bucket challenge! ️ Brrrrr... 3d
  •   secretstella Best preview pic ever! Also I love your scream/wimper! 3d

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foreverdieting Nothing beats a good early morning car boot sale. Found some lovely things! 4d
  •   papermaillove Do they not know how much they cost? :O 4d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove yeah today was a good car booty the mini domino is brand new & in perfect condition! The a5 Kendal is used & has a bit of wear on the outside (like scuffs on the leather & depression on the front cover around the rings & the clasp bit is a little worn. But the inside is in excellent condition & the rings are nice & tight! I'm happy 4d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove the one with the domino said it was a gift & haggled her from £2 to £1. & then Kendal was owned by this guy who I also haggled from £2 to £1! Yay me!! 4d
  •   papermaillove Even if you'd paid £2 each that'd be stupidly cheap! Especially for the A5! Kendals are leather, right? 4d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove I know :3 was so lucky! I am constantly in charity shops & bootsales in the hunt for Filofaxes & this is the first time I've ever found any & I found two! yeah the Kendal is brown oiled leather - super soft 4d
  •   papermaillove What section would they be in in charity shops? I have loads near me, but don't go nearly enough! 4d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove I've only ever seen two in charity shops before - one was in the bric'a'brac section & the other had one in a cabinet with slightly more expensive stuff. I guess some may put them near the books? Not sure! Rarely find them in charity shops. Asked a local charity shop once if they had any & they said they get them in quite often but they just throw them away as they assume no one would buy them! Wtf were they thinking?! Haha 4d
  •   papermaillove What the hell? They could make good money on them! 4d

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foreverdieting Fuck everything. I need a break. 4d

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foreverdieting Just feel like my world is caving in. I know whether to go back to college or not is a relatively simple decision for anyone else, but me being the most indecisive person on this earth, the decision is taking over my life. It's making me so exhausted. Constantly of my mind like every minute of everyday. I am feeling so stressed & run down over it that on the way home from work tonight I could hardly be bothered to keep my arms up to hold the steering wheel... Just wanna stop time so I will never have to make the decision. I just don't wanna do the wrong thing. It's just I'm not sure which is wrong & which is right... Might get a bit drunk & take my mind off it for a while... 4d

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foreverdieting Why did I buy these? I don't know. Long shift today, feeling stressed out & just overall shit. Gunna be fat forever. 4d

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foreverdieting Outgoing snailmail for @sylverrr 5d
  •   jilllynn1984 Very pretty! 5d
  •   sylverrr Yay! :) 5d
  •   foreverdieting @sylverrr it did look super pretty until it got smothered in about 100 stamps cos I'm too poor to just buy one that cost the whole amount, so I had to use my four first class ones & then like hundreds of 5p, 2p and 1p stamps! Haha, sorry! 4d
  •   sylverrr Lol. No worries. I like how the stamps look from over there anyways. So *thumbs up* 4d

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foreverdieting Today's and yesterday's incoming snailmail from @inthelifeoflolza, @owright93 & @pretty_princess_peach I love it all! Thank you! 5d

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foreverdieting I have never felt so stressed out in my life. I cannot decide whether or not I should go back to college for another academic year... Students in college (apart from my wonderful @snailemmail) hate me & alienate me from things & find me weird & unapproachable... They don't give me a chance. And well the tutors... Where do I start. They are always putting me down. They do not understand anything about depression or anxiety & they belittle me constantly. They are constantly pointing out how negative I am, but when I am positive they do not acknowledge it. They do not believe I have a future. I got told by the head of department that I should work "in the background" away from customers/public as I'm not confident enough & cos of my mental state. She said I'd be good at filing paperwork in an office. So why do I need a shitty qualification if that's all I'm good for?! One teacher always asks of I've taken my tablet, when I'm looking down, instead of asking if I'm okay, as if they're some kind of "happy pill"... Also the stress of last year made me quite ill & rundown & I ate to help the stress & I put on over 1 stone in weight between Sept 13 & June 14. I got the highest grade possible through putting myself through so much stress & I don't feel I have it in me to push myself that much again. I don't want my D*D* I've earned from last year drop if I can't keep producing Distinctions... No matter what decision I make, it feels like the wrong one. If I don't go to college my future is going nowhere - I have no real future. If I do go to college I will be fucking miserable & may affect last years grade (if I leave next year with anything less than D*D*D* I'd rather just die). I feel like I'd rather be dead right now so I don't HAVE to make a decision. The stress of just trying to decide what is best to do is making me starting to binge eat again. I just hate the people. They make me feel so small & so abnormal. 5d
  •   papermaillove Is continuing the course at another college an option? Obviously you don't know what the other students would be like, but the staff sound AWFUL! I've normally had a really good response from teachers/tutors at school/college/uni, so it does sound like these are just especially bad and you shouldn't have to put up with it. It's bullying and it's unacceptable. 5d
  •   foreverdieting @papermaillove I had a look & there is one other campus 45 mins from my home that does the course, but on evenings I have work, I don't know how realistic it'd be to get from the campus & back to work in time.. I know. There's only a councillor on campus to turn to about any problems I'm having but I have to book an appointment & she's only in a couple days a week so other days I have to deal with it alone. :( It was arranged that I could go to Laura (one of my tutors) but she seems very pissed off that she was landed with helping me that I just don't want her help... :( I don't want my shirty issues to be a burden to her if really she doesn't wanna know. :( just so conflicted on what to do :( 5d
  •   iangrinter @foreverdieting grades are just letters on a page. Do what you want to do! Put yourself and your well being first! :) take pleasure in the little things in life! Hope you're okay dude 5d
  •   owright93 Give it a try, if you dont like it leave but at least you've tried! Xxxx 5d

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foreverdieting This week so far! ... Still waiting for my FF to be delivered. 6d

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foreverdieting Tomorrow's outgoing snailmail for @lara_recovers! 6d
  •   yre90 Hello there! You are looking for new penpals?. 6d
  •   lara_recovers Can't wait!! 6d
  •   foreverdieting @yre90 hi! Thank you for the interest but I'm not looking for anymore penpals at the moment! Sorry 6d
  •   yre90 Ok :) 6d

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